Previously on Project Runway: We met a new crop of designers, and some people made no impression while others made a poor impression. Gunnar was on last year, but got cut right away, and then he came back. In the interim he decided that the best thing would be for him to become Josh 2.0, and he’s not even that funny. But he’s already picked a fight, so…yeah. Designers brought one look from home and were asked to make another one. Ven did very well, but it was Chris who won. Beatrice can’t sew and they actually eliminated her instead of saying what a great job she did for someone who couldn’t sew. It’s sad that I’m impressed with that. (click for more)
The designers don’t seem to be morning people. At least not the boys. Lantie says she was stunned to be in the bottom three. Ven thinks he should have won. That’s what they all say.
Heidi greets everyone on the runway and congratulates them. Kooan says he is going to make sure everything’s perfect. Chris has immunity. Heidi says something about high expectations (…ha) and this is not child’s play. So now go find Tim at a “sweet” location, and something else about kids. No model selection I guess. Dmitry is worried.
Tim is waiting for them outside Dylan’s Candy Bar. Dylan is Ralph Lauren’s daughter. Unconventional materials challenge! Everything inside is available, and they can make anything. Gunnar claims he was dreaming about a candy challenge. Whatever. Raul is less than thrilled. The budget is $250, but Dylan is a nice person so half off the whole store! Also Dylan is the guest judge, which is pretty cool.
30 minutes to shop, and then one day to make things. There is pretty much anything you can think of, but I am sad to see actual like, T-shirts and fabric. You know people are buying those. Buffi is trying to avoid those things, but Andrea is not. I think there is going to be a lot of trash talking about who bought actual fabric and who is making pure candy clothing. Ven is thinking of stained glass windows. Lantie is making sure to have a foundation. I think Raul wants to buy galoshes for his model to walk in. Chris asks for a chocolate boyfriend. Hee. No one appears to go over budget.
Fabio is smashing rock candy for texture. Buffi wants her dress to look wearable. I think she is weaving bubble gum strips. Elena wants the straight lines of licorice. Tim comes in to remind them to push boundaries and wow the judges. They have until 1am. Tim tells Chris since he has immunity, he could take a nap this whole challenge, but probably shouldn’t. Yeah, don’t do that. Today’s winner will also get immunity.
Gunnar is watching Chris and making faces, for no reason. Do your own work. Gunnar interviews that Chris is totally threatened by him, which has everything to do with his talent and personality and nothing to do with how Gunnar attacked him yesterday for no reason. Or, since Chris is going about his business and Gunnar is obsessed with watching him, I’m thinking maybe Chris is not the one who’s threatened. Alicia is making a one-shouldered overall short. And some truffle looking chocolate, to represent dirt. Sonjia got gummi sharks, so she’s trying to glue them tightly together so you can’t see the muslin. Chris describes himself as the “nice twin”, compared to Gunnar. Oh, it would have been so much better if you had never mentioned him at all. Buffi is using an umbrella as a skirt, so in order to break the metal parts she’s smashing them with a hammer. Ven thinks she’s being obnoxious for no reason. Lantie starts talking about how she almost opened her own store but the economy tanked. She wants an eye-catching design. Dmitry interviews that Lantie isn’t pushing herself, but he seems to explain that by saying she’s still trying to decide what to make. Andrea is sewing an apron out of what looks like a pillow or something. She says “Victorian candy clerk gone wild”. Yup. She also is very confident, so there’s that. Kooan is working hard and being quiet. He’s making a sweater dress out of woven Twizzlers. I think there also is a giant eye and mouth on the dress. But he’s weaving Twizzlers, so that’s something if he can pull it off. He has to hot glue the pieces together, but it’s not going well. Ven and Sonjia chat in the sewing room and both agree that the outfits should be made out of candy, but that from far away they should look like real clothing. As opposed to a costume. Ven brags about his awards from school.
Tim time! Nathan has a bell shaped skirt and he’s concerned about weight. Chris is making a skirt out of a gang of stuff. Tim says it’s ambitious and that Chris has won and wants to stay in the top. Raul…I don’t know what he’s using, but it looks like fabric. Even close up, it looks like heavy corduroy. Melissa has licorice, but right now there is just an open weave thing. Elena’s dress is going to be all one color, and Tim points out she can’t do anything about that now. Sonjia’s jelly beans and sharks look pretty cool. Ven has framed out panels in black licorice, and he’s going to bust up some candy and make it as close to glass as possible. Fabio says something about glue, and Tim says “This is a ‘glue the shit out of it’ moment.” Hee. Buffi’s weaving looks pretty awesome. Gunnar is making a checkerboard pattern with licorice. He babbles about loud patterns and his peplum and weight. Dmitry is waiting for his model to show up to start his corset. And gluing, I guess. Tim is horrified and says he can’t possibly wait that long. Kooan is just weird. He only has a bib’s-worth of dress and wants to start over. Alicia needs time. Lantie has a bunch of fabric and candy to glue still and then she starts talking about rain boots. Andrea has an apron out of candy dots. I guess it really is the candy dots on paper, and not fabric that looks like candy dots? Tim is rendered speechless for a long time, and finally says he’s just going to be direct: he does not have the words to explain how underwhelmed he is. It’s a craft project and he literally says “You are throwing the challenge”. Wow. Andrea is shocked. She interviews that she has no idea what she’s going to do, and then she says she can’t do this now and asks them to turn off the cameras. And she gets up and leaves the confessional.
Back from commercial Andrea says she had cut up her design, but then realized she didn’t really have to listen to Tim, but now she’s cut up her design. Dmitry is still worried about his corset fitting his model. Elena is sick of gluing licorice, and it appears that beige licorice is pina colada flavored. Ew. Kooan has made a face in his dress. Heh.
The models finally show up. Kooan’s model looks worried. Dmitry has lucked out that his dress works really well. Gunnar flirts with his model, except for the part where shut up, Gunnar. Then he wanders around and announces he wants to check out what everyone’s doing. Girl, please. Chris rolls his eyes and sighs loudly, but seriously, Gunnar is going around the whole room telling everyone how great they are. Then Chris imitates Gunnar’s laugh which is hilarious. Andrea appears to be resewing her garment and putting in strips to cover the seams. She’s going to stand by her original outfit. Lantie is starting over with like two hours left, but she’s using the umbrella material and I don’t see any candy in it. Ven tells us how no woman will want to buy Kooan’s clothes, as if most women are totally OK with buying dresses made out of candy as long as they look good. A lot of last minute flailing and hot glue burns. Elena drips glue straight out of the gun onto her leg. That sucks. Chris is like “She’s hurt, but why are you wearing hoochie shorts to work?!” Because generally a clothing designer isn’t using hot glue, is why. She’s starting to freak out.
The next morning, Elena is still in pain and she looks exhausted. When the designers arrive at Parsons, all of a sudden Kooan freaks out and runs to his dress form. Apparently he used cotton candy as part of the skirt, and overnight it dissolved. It looks like the fabric has rotted away or something. Luckily he has more, but it’s another color. Buffi’s bird’s nest has also melted. Lantie is feeling confident. Tim gives them two hours. Side note: shut up, Gunnar’s super-fake-looking glasses. Elena tries to move her dress so she can reglue some stuff, and it rips. I’m impressed she put a zipper in it though. Hot makeup guy. There is a bunch of product placement. Ven tells his model she has to stand up straight and can’t touch anyone.
Heidi is wearing an ugly snakeskin jumpsuit. Bleh. Gunnar: sheath dress in black and white checkerboard pattern, with a big black peplum. Also I’m glad to see they’ve gone back to listing the materials used, which is mostly licorice. It’s a really stiff peplum but she can touch it anyway. Sonjia: also a sheath dress, with flaps over both hips and sort of in the front. The collar is gummi sharks, and then the rest of the dress is jelly beans. It looks really good. When she turns around, you can see the hip flaps are actually tied on? And covered in gumballs. Melissa: black tank top and skirt, with black licorice. It’s not very exciting, and I think most of the top is just bare fabric. Nathan: strapless dress with a bell shaped stiff skirt. It’s all covered in gumballs and foil-covered chocolates. It looks awesome, but the model is walking with her hands holding the bottom of the skirt because it weighs so much. Andrea: long apron made out of candy buttons. It’s straight, there’s no waistline or any shaping to it. In the back, there’s a bustle/skirt back that seems to be a separate piece, made out of the umbrella fabric. Alicia: a bandeau bikini top, sort of covered in white gumballs, and a one-shouldered overall thing, with I think shorts attached. It’s loose, and seems to be green with an orange waist. At the bottom I think she ran out of candy because there is a lot of muslin. Elena: short dress in beige licorice. There are strong shoulders and short sleeves. It’s not bad, and then the pieces of candy start falling off onto the runway. Fabio: blue dress that looks like real fabric. The top is crushed rock candy, left big, and the skirt looks painted, and there are white gumballs up the side.
Dmitry: short black dress with a halter top, and fringe. He made fringe out of candy and it looks pretty good. But there isn’t any candy on top? It’s hard to tell. I will say what candy he did use looks like beading. Kooan: it’s a dress that is a giant face. It’s not quite abstract enough to maybe pass as not a face. Orange on top, with pointy white teeth and a fuzzy pink skirt. Things are falling off it. Is it all jelly beans? In the back, there are thick ropes draped over her butt. Chris: short dress with a sweetheart neckline, in chevrons of candy. It looks pretty good. Sparkly and lots of stripes. Raul: two piece with exposed midriff, in licorice and it doesn’t look like candy. Buffi: the top with the woven candy strips looks amazing. The skirt is a pink handkerchief hem with rows of candy on it, but not covering it. Lantie: halter top and handkerchief hem skirt made of out umbrellas, with jelly bean flowers outlined on the skirt. And galoshes. It looks pretty lame. Ven: strapless dress with an art deco look to it. The panels and stuff are outlined in black, and then inside are crushed rock candy in colors, so it looks painted. The rose motif he did in his top last week shows up again in the skirt.
Gunnar, Elena, Ven, Sonjia, Lantie, and Buffi are called up. Everyone else is safe. Woah, that means Andrea and her apron thing are safe. Oo, girl. When the models come back out, Elena’s model is now missing like, 15% of her licorice. Buffi was thinking of Carrie Bradshaw. The skirt is paper, and Heidi wishes it was candy. Plus there is a bag and a lollipop and bracelets and the bird’s nest. Too many things. Kors says “Toddlers and Tiaras” but does give her credit for the top. He thinks she looks insane and not fun. Nina is clearly disgusted. Sonjia’s skirt has crushed rock candy. There’s a lot of texture and a good shape. Also Sonjia put a square hat on her, and Heidi doesn’t like that. But the dress is good. She gets nothing but praise, and even Nina doesn’t care it’s a little like a costume because there’s a theme and it’s well made. Lantie talks about her meltdown, and this is her second dress, and the galoshes are actually cut down somehow to make booties. Kors says she’s having the same problems as last time. It’s just fabric with ornamentation. Kors calls her a decorator, which is harsh but fair, and Lantie tries to blame the time factor but that doesn’t work at all. She didn’t do anywhere enough. Nina is the nice one and says “At least it’s not atrocious”. Ven’s dress is fantastic. Heidi loves it of course. Nina raves about it, so you know it’s good. Elena’s dress looks terrible now, all half bare. Heidi knows from the silhouette it was Elena’s dress, but it looks like macaroni art. They keep cutting to Gunnar making faces, just like Kenley, and shut up Gunnar. It’s not joyful, and Kors starts babbling about eyes and whatnot. Elena likes it, and she tries to defend herself by saying she wants that warrior look, but you can have that look and still look good. It’s bulky. Somehow no one has mentioned the fact that the glue is failing. Nina says she can’t be monotone all the time. Gunnar made jewelry too, so…good for him I guess. Heidi likes that he created a print, and Kors likes that he thought about it.
Buffi is upset about her critique. Lantie is still complaining about not having time. Gunnar is the only one to make candy accessories, Sonjia made a fun candy dress that was made well, Ven’s dress is gorgeous. The judges talk about Sonjia vs. Ven for the win but don’t say their decision. Lantie’s materials had no transformation, and they don’t have any patience for her excuses. Everyone hated Buffi’s because it was too much, but Kors knows that she spent all her time on the top and had to make a skirt out of paper. Elena made a stiff dress and her “I must stay true to my aesthetic” offended everyone. They STILL don’t mention the fact that it was falling apart everywhere.
Ven is the winner. Nice. He has to add in confessional that he should have won last time too. Sonjia is in. Gunnar is in. Elena is in. What? That thing was terrible. Stupid. Lantie is out. She didn’t think she was going out so early, and this is not a good representation of her designs. When they’re talking to her about her elimination, she actually says “I don’t have anything else to say”. Well then.
Next time: teams of two, make looks for former designers (GOD), shut up Kenley, Andrea fails at something.
Thursday, July 26, 2012
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
Hell's Kitchen 7/24/12--"6 Chefs Compete" summary
Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: Southern food was featured, and even though Robyn brought up raw chicken more than once, and every single chef was kicked out of the kitchen, Kimmie was sent home. She wasn’t cooking the fish well, and she never stepped up, even though she talked all the time about how she cooked Southern food and that was her wheelhouse.
Notice also that the title says six chefs while there are seven chefs left. Robyn thinks she is out of chances. Christina tries to talk up her team by saying that sometimes fewer people in the kitchen means they work better together. But Dana thinks having three people on their team, one of which is Barbie, is not a good thing.
In the morning, as everyone heads to the kitchen, someone says “It’s on like Donkey Kong”, which is my favorite reality show trash talk saying. I think it might have been Clemenza. Ramsey says as a team, they have to cook three dishes from the regular menu. Only one person from each team is in the kitchen at any one time. You cook five minutes and then someone else goes in. You get 15 seconds to explain what you’ve been doing. Most accurate dishes win. Brian babbles for a while about how easy this should be.
Dana and Justin are up first, and Ramsey tells them their three dishes are risotto, lamb, and cod. Dana knows to start with the lamb, because it takes the longest. Justin screws up somehow, because I guess he thought the risotto was partially cooked. When they switch, Dana and Justin have to explain everything. Clemenza wastes time tying his apron on backwards. Christina starts her risotto, but Clemenza is cutting up bok choy or something. Barbie and Brian seem to do OK? Robyn burns her first portion of fish. Dana runs around, and Barbie doesn’t think she did anything but I don’t know what Barbie did either. Robyn is not very helpful with her explanation, and Christina says Dana had the stove up too high and the risotto is kind of burnt. Justin says both the lamb and cod are raw. Barbie insists Christina pulled the cod too early. Clemenza has to plate, and he says he has no idea what Justin said. Barbie complains that she has to find everything and it’s a hot mess. I think they both make it?
The men’s risotto is terrible and sticks to the plate, but the women’s risotto is burnt. The men have crunchy risotto on top of it so no one gets a point. Clemenza forgot the broth on the fish, but the women’s is raw. Still no points for anyone. The men turn in nasty sauce, but Barbie has butchered the lamb horribly and it is also nasty. Ramsey says for the first time ever, there is no winner. Everyone loses. Someone could have gone to the beach in a helicopter, but all the chefs suck this season. Clean the restaurant and detail the cars. Restaurant open tonight. Ramsey promises not to wait until the end of service to get rid of everyone.
The men decide to clean the inside of the car first, except for Robyn, who tells all of them to shut the doors so she can wash the outside. Clemenza does not appreciate the bossiness. Dana is skimming dead leaves out of the fountain. Heh. She yells a lot in confessional about how it would be great to go to the beach.
Ramsey insists they need a great service. He pulls out a covered dish and talks about how inspiring it is or whatever. It’s a black jacket. He says they need to be amazing.
Clemenza does not shout times loud enough. He says he’s ready, and he and Justin work together well to serve diners. The women are doing well also, but Christina has brought up an over-large serving. She tries to use the leftovers, but Ramsey catches her. He really just tells her not to do that, she doesn’t get in that much trouble. Clemenza gets five risottos at once, and Justin offers to help, but he refuses for some reason. They’re all cooked differently and are different colors. Ramsey makes everyone tell him to cook it all in one pan. Barbie keeps offering to help, while Christina has no interest in her help. She keeps talking, saying “I started you over because it was burning, so I took the pan away” but Christina has no interest in Barbie’s help. Sadly, it really was burnt so Christina gets yelled at. Second attempt is fine. Clemenza brings up good risotto, so both teams move to entrees.
Brian tries to bring up Wellingtons, but they’re raw. Some of them are, anyway. Robyn insists she’s on top of garnish, but it’s all in the oven for some reason. Ramsey tells her that makes him nervous, but Robyn says her team told her it was the holding oven. What? Why didn’t we see that? Robyn is a lot of things, but I don’t think she wouldn’t make that up. Her team would totally screw her by telling her to put all the garnish in the oven, and then snickering about how stupid she is. If she says they told her, then they told her, even if they were just doing it to make her look stupid. Ramsey yells and then tries to find out what happened. Her whole team denies it, and I’m sad there is no footage. Maybe she did make it up. She seriously has a ton of garnish in the oven. Justin and Clemenza seem to yell a lot and then get Robyn back on track. Sadly the fish is crappy reheated bass, and Robyn tries not to laugh at Justin and mostly manages. Justin gets yelled at. Robyn sets a pan on fire in the middle of Ramsey’s tirade which is kind of funny. The women are doing extremely well. Dana is cooking three portions of bass in three different pans, so Ramsey points out she might want to use one pan to make it easier. Of course he curses while he does it. Then he goes over and takes over her station. Oo, burn. The women finish, as Brian overcooks a steak. So this table is still not out, and some table walks out. Then the Wellington is overcooked. Ramsey drags Brian over and makes Barbie take over his station. Brian stands there and curses and says he feels like a castrated dog. Clemenza tells him to stay with it, but he curses that there’s nothing he can do, because he’s been booted. Barbie’s doing a good job but I wish it was one of the other two girls.
After service, the girls get a “celebration”: Ramsey gives them all black jackets and champagne. The men’s team has to come up with two names for elimination. Robyn immediately says Justin is a liar and she gets all “you are messing with a crazy bitch”. Somehow Brian loses it and says that it’s not personal, Robyn is the worst, and so forth. I can’t figure out what is going on. I think Robyn is definitely up but they can’t decide on the second.
Clemenza says Robyn is up, because she is the weakest link, and he and Brian are tied and they can’t get past the tie. Ramsey is pissed they can’t follow directions and tells all four of them to come forward. Robyn says she has fight and passion and she deserves to stay. Brian also knows he deserves a black jacket. Clemenza is a team player and has learned from his mistakes. Justin is super focused and fights every day. Clemenza! Take off your jacket! Justin too! Both of you get black jackets. Ramsey makes it clear these jackets are for what they’ve done so far, not for tonight. Robyn stays, and Brian goes. Sad. I liked Brian and his weirdness. Ramsey specifically tells Robyn not to make him regret this. Of course she is super cocky she made it. Barbie is still cocky about how she is the best.
Next time: Ramsey says there is another team, everyone freaks out, Robyn doesn’t do well. Dana gets yelled at. Much cursing ensues.
Notice also that the title says six chefs while there are seven chefs left. Robyn thinks she is out of chances. Christina tries to talk up her team by saying that sometimes fewer people in the kitchen means they work better together. But Dana thinks having three people on their team, one of which is Barbie, is not a good thing.
In the morning, as everyone heads to the kitchen, someone says “It’s on like Donkey Kong”, which is my favorite reality show trash talk saying. I think it might have been Clemenza. Ramsey says as a team, they have to cook three dishes from the regular menu. Only one person from each team is in the kitchen at any one time. You cook five minutes and then someone else goes in. You get 15 seconds to explain what you’ve been doing. Most accurate dishes win. Brian babbles for a while about how easy this should be.
Dana and Justin are up first, and Ramsey tells them their three dishes are risotto, lamb, and cod. Dana knows to start with the lamb, because it takes the longest. Justin screws up somehow, because I guess he thought the risotto was partially cooked. When they switch, Dana and Justin have to explain everything. Clemenza wastes time tying his apron on backwards. Christina starts her risotto, but Clemenza is cutting up bok choy or something. Barbie and Brian seem to do OK? Robyn burns her first portion of fish. Dana runs around, and Barbie doesn’t think she did anything but I don’t know what Barbie did either. Robyn is not very helpful with her explanation, and Christina says Dana had the stove up too high and the risotto is kind of burnt. Justin says both the lamb and cod are raw. Barbie insists Christina pulled the cod too early. Clemenza has to plate, and he says he has no idea what Justin said. Barbie complains that she has to find everything and it’s a hot mess. I think they both make it?
The men’s risotto is terrible and sticks to the plate, but the women’s risotto is burnt. The men have crunchy risotto on top of it so no one gets a point. Clemenza forgot the broth on the fish, but the women’s is raw. Still no points for anyone. The men turn in nasty sauce, but Barbie has butchered the lamb horribly and it is also nasty. Ramsey says for the first time ever, there is no winner. Everyone loses. Someone could have gone to the beach in a helicopter, but all the chefs suck this season. Clean the restaurant and detail the cars. Restaurant open tonight. Ramsey promises not to wait until the end of service to get rid of everyone.
The men decide to clean the inside of the car first, except for Robyn, who tells all of them to shut the doors so she can wash the outside. Clemenza does not appreciate the bossiness. Dana is skimming dead leaves out of the fountain. Heh. She yells a lot in confessional about how it would be great to go to the beach.
Ramsey insists they need a great service. He pulls out a covered dish and talks about how inspiring it is or whatever. It’s a black jacket. He says they need to be amazing.
Clemenza does not shout times loud enough. He says he’s ready, and he and Justin work together well to serve diners. The women are doing well also, but Christina has brought up an over-large serving. She tries to use the leftovers, but Ramsey catches her. He really just tells her not to do that, she doesn’t get in that much trouble. Clemenza gets five risottos at once, and Justin offers to help, but he refuses for some reason. They’re all cooked differently and are different colors. Ramsey makes everyone tell him to cook it all in one pan. Barbie keeps offering to help, while Christina has no interest in her help. She keeps talking, saying “I started you over because it was burning, so I took the pan away” but Christina has no interest in Barbie’s help. Sadly, it really was burnt so Christina gets yelled at. Second attempt is fine. Clemenza brings up good risotto, so both teams move to entrees.
Brian tries to bring up Wellingtons, but they’re raw. Some of them are, anyway. Robyn insists she’s on top of garnish, but it’s all in the oven for some reason. Ramsey tells her that makes him nervous, but Robyn says her team told her it was the holding oven. What? Why didn’t we see that? Robyn is a lot of things, but I don’t think she wouldn’t make that up. Her team would totally screw her by telling her to put all the garnish in the oven, and then snickering about how stupid she is. If she says they told her, then they told her, even if they were just doing it to make her look stupid. Ramsey yells and then tries to find out what happened. Her whole team denies it, and I’m sad there is no footage. Maybe she did make it up. She seriously has a ton of garnish in the oven. Justin and Clemenza seem to yell a lot and then get Robyn back on track. Sadly the fish is crappy reheated bass, and Robyn tries not to laugh at Justin and mostly manages. Justin gets yelled at. Robyn sets a pan on fire in the middle of Ramsey’s tirade which is kind of funny. The women are doing extremely well. Dana is cooking three portions of bass in three different pans, so Ramsey points out she might want to use one pan to make it easier. Of course he curses while he does it. Then he goes over and takes over her station. Oo, burn. The women finish, as Brian overcooks a steak. So this table is still not out, and some table walks out. Then the Wellington is overcooked. Ramsey drags Brian over and makes Barbie take over his station. Brian stands there and curses and says he feels like a castrated dog. Clemenza tells him to stay with it, but he curses that there’s nothing he can do, because he’s been booted. Barbie’s doing a good job but I wish it was one of the other two girls.
After service, the girls get a “celebration”: Ramsey gives them all black jackets and champagne. The men’s team has to come up with two names for elimination. Robyn immediately says Justin is a liar and she gets all “you are messing with a crazy bitch”. Somehow Brian loses it and says that it’s not personal, Robyn is the worst, and so forth. I can’t figure out what is going on. I think Robyn is definitely up but they can’t decide on the second.
Clemenza says Robyn is up, because she is the weakest link, and he and Brian are tied and they can’t get past the tie. Ramsey is pissed they can’t follow directions and tells all four of them to come forward. Robyn says she has fight and passion and she deserves to stay. Brian also knows he deserves a black jacket. Clemenza is a team player and has learned from his mistakes. Justin is super focused and fights every day. Clemenza! Take off your jacket! Justin too! Both of you get black jackets. Ramsey makes it clear these jackets are for what they’ve done so far, not for tonight. Robyn stays, and Brian goes. Sad. I liked Brian and his weirdness. Ramsey specifically tells Robyn not to make him regret this. Of course she is super cocky she made it. Barbie is still cocky about how she is the best.
Next time: Ramsey says there is another team, everyone freaks out, Robyn doesn’t do well. Dana gets yelled at. Much cursing ensues.
Monday, July 23, 2012
Hell's Kitchen 7/23/12--"7 Chefs Compete" summary
Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: dinner service was not that exciting, people were terrible, the usual things. Barbie took forever on prep and then sat back and let everyone fail and was smug about it. Clemenza had trouble keeping track of how many orders of things he needed. The whole men’s team (and Robyn) got kicked out, but Tiffany finally went home. Ramsey was pissed because the teams made their own menus and still couldn’t execute because everyone appears to suck this season. (click for more)
Barbie gloats. Shut up Barbie. Kimmie is crying again, but she does that all the time so, whatevs. She’s apparently forced to confide in Robyn, who is fine with it because she doesn’t have to deal with that team anymore anyway.
Ramsey greets everyone with a giant map of the US with random foods stuck on the proper spots. Like, cheese in Wisconsin. Hee. Ramsey starts talking about regional cuisine, but then the challenge is just on Southern cuisine. Kimmie is pleased, because as you will recall, she is from the South. Behind the giant map is a big gospel choir in black robes, complete with one diva in white with a giant hat. That was fun. Everyone has to reinvent “a classic Southern dish”. Kimmie is freaking out. Now everyone in the choir has a fan with their name on it. Some people have entrees, some have side dishes. Barbie chooses to go up against Clemenza, and they end up with catfish and collard greens. For no reason, whatever choir member is chosen sings the ingredient. Brian takes on Kimmie because he thinks she’s the best. Pork chops and grits. Kimmie declares no one’s had grits like hers. Yup. Christina and Justin, fried chicken and mac and cheese. Dana vs. Robyn, meatloaf and sweet potato.
30 minutes to cook. Dana isn’t sure how she’s going to reinvent meatloaf. Justin has never made fried chicken. He is pounding with a frying pan. It looks like Christina took the skin off her chicken. But the skin is the best part of fried chicken! Brian says he doesn’t know how to make grits, but he also claims to be unable to read the box. Kimmie’s grits look OK, but the pot they’re in looks like it’s boiled over several times. Robyn has nutmeg and cinnamon and salt, I hope in her sweet potatoes and not the meatloaf.
Guest judge is Tanya Steel, who is the editor of Epicurious. Barbie and Clemenza are up first. Barbie did “Latin” catfish. It looks good and is tasty. Clemenza made a catfish po boy. Both of them made bacon collard greens, but Clemenza undercooked his fish so the women get a point. Kimmie and Brian come up next. Kimmie says a bunch of trash talk. She serves an oregano panko-crusted pork chop and the grits have cream, bacon, Monterey Jack and Swiss cheeses. Ramsey says it looks dull, but it tastes good. Brian has “Southern rubbed” pork chop with buttermilk brown sugar grits. They both rub it in that it looks pretty, but sadly the pork chop is raw. Much as I would like Kimmie to get shot down, she wins the point. Christina and Justin. Christina’s fried chicken has gravy and there is a fried kale chip on top of the mac and cheese. The batter is falling off the chicken and is soggy, so Justin and his chicken and lobster mac and cheese get the point. Last battle: meatloaf. Robyn has an open-faced meatloaf sandwich with sweet potato puree. The spices go over well, but apparently she didn’t mix the salt in enough. Dana wrapped her meatloaf in bacon. They say it’s “posh”, but there is too much lamb? In the end, Dana wins so the women finally win something. Out of those four, Dana’s dish is declared the best, and she’ll get her recipe on Epicurious. The prize for the team is the photo shoot prize, followed by lunch at the Four Seasons in Beverly Hills. Losers have to prep both kitchens, and the whole menu is “fine dining Southern cuisine” so it’s all brand new, plus baking bread and hand churning butter. Heh.
Watching the Blue team churn butter is hilarious. In a terribly mean twist, the photoshoot is in the dining room. Kimmie brags that she’s a “natural” beauty and doesn’t usually wear makeup or fix her hair or whatever. Oh, producers, you put that in just to be mean. I’m not going to take the bait on that one. Ramsey cracks jokes about Charlie’s Angels and stuff. The girls have a nice lunch, until Dana says her sweet potatoes were bangin’ and Barbie can’t just let it slide. She rolls her eyes and says “That’s really nice” all fake. Then she stares at Dana all creepy. Barbie claims Dana is full of herself and she’s just letting everyone know, or something. The men make rolls, as Clemenza eats some.
Dana says as long as Barbie can “check her bitch ass at the door“, they’ll have a great service. Ramsey reminds all of them they should not be making stupid mistakes. Then he hollers at Kimmie that she is key to the women doing well, as she prides herself on this style of cooking. No pressure or anything. I think what Ramsey is really saying is “You run your mouth a lot, so you’d better back it up”.
Dana interviews about how easy crab cakes are, and then in a twist for this show, she brings up nice crab cakes. The women seem to have it together so far. Brian says something about showing the oysters who is Big Daddy or something, but he brings up rubbery oysters for a first attempt. Not a twist, the second attempt is perfect. Women are already done with their appetizers. Kimmie is confident, and they all seem to be communicating, but Kimmie’s burned all the fish. Barbie gets cocky about it in confessional. Brian is trying to do well, but he’s also burned the fish. Ramsey makes him eat it, which is not a good sign, but then when he asks Brian how it tastes, instead of saying it tastes burnt, Brian says “It tastes like fish, Chef.” Oo. Wrong answer. Ramsey kicks him out, but he goes out the front. He knows he should have kept his mouth shut. The maitre d’ (I refuse to learn his name, JP forever!) stops him and tells him to go back and fight. I guess Brian was just going to keep walking and go home? He runs back in, but Ramsey is like, what are you doing here? Brian manages this time to say the fish was burnt, and promises it won’t happen again. Oh, like that wasn’t carefully arranged. Blue team is now behind. Kimmie seems to have burned her fish again, and she slaps the spatula down in anger. And splashes herself with grease. She says she’s burned really bad on one side of her face, but you can’t see it. Brian claims he doesn’t make the same mistake twice, and he doesn’t, but Robyn has now turned in raw chicken. Ramsey yells at Brian too for no reason. Justin jumps in and starts bossing everyone around.
Barbie blames Kimmie for screwing up and making everyone behind, but she promises in confessional that she’s going to be on point. This, of course, is right before the clip of her bringing up unseasoned kale. She has no explanation. Christina takes over some of the garnish station. The men’s team is not answering Ramsey, but then they seem to be ready to go. And then Robyn’s chicken is raw again. She’s pissed. Ramsey kicks the whole team out, which seems unfair. Robyn begs him to only kick her out, but he says “don’t tell me what to do” and they’re all out. Clemenza tells Robyn she was all over the place and making him crazy. Kimmie brings up catfish that is somehow both raw and burnt, so the women are all kicked out too. I would bet Ramsey and his two sous chefs can get dinner out faster than all 8 of those guys.
Kimmie claimed this is the first service she fucked up. Yeah. Clemenza comforts her. Chef Scott comes upstairs, to yell at them and tell them to go downstairs. Ramsey stops them in the back hallway and says he can’t take any more. Now he only wants one person from each team to be up for elimination, which, why did we narrow it down?
Robyn knows she served raw chicken, but then she says she didn’t get kicked out of the kitchen. I guess we’re not counting that time ALL OF THEM got kicked out. Anyway, she wants to nominate Brian. Christina wants to vote for Kimmie, but Kimmie’s argument seems to be “I splashed hot oil on myself and I didn’t leave, so don’t vote for me”. Kimmie wants to get rid of Barbie, which I can get behind also. Then we get a confessional from Barbie where she said “I am not leaving tonight, I am sure of that” so I hope that is some good foreshadowing. Dana points out that she wants to vote Barbie because Kimmie is a much better team player, but doing so makes a tie.
The women put up Kimmie, because of the fish station. The men put up Robyn, who couldn’t focus, plus raw chicken. She looks surprised, which is weird. Robyn says she’s not ready to go, and Kimmie just lost control of the fish. Kimmie also says she’s better than Robyn (to be fair, Ramsey asked her). Robyn thinks she’s better than Kimmie, and she’s letting her head get the best of her. Ramsey tells her it’s a competition, not therapy. Heh. Robyn! Back in line! Woah. Ramsey tells Kimmie she’s not ready for his restaurant. Kimmie of course feels Barbie should be going home instead. Ramsey is pissed. Robyn says some reality-show cliché about only trusting herself. Barbie is cocky.
Next time: Christina and Dana shut out Barbie, Robyn says her team sabotaged her but none of them will admit it. Something is shocking.
Barbie gloats. Shut up Barbie. Kimmie is crying again, but she does that all the time so, whatevs. She’s apparently forced to confide in Robyn, who is fine with it because she doesn’t have to deal with that team anymore anyway.
Ramsey greets everyone with a giant map of the US with random foods stuck on the proper spots. Like, cheese in Wisconsin. Hee. Ramsey starts talking about regional cuisine, but then the challenge is just on Southern cuisine. Kimmie is pleased, because as you will recall, she is from the South. Behind the giant map is a big gospel choir in black robes, complete with one diva in white with a giant hat. That was fun. Everyone has to reinvent “a classic Southern dish”. Kimmie is freaking out. Now everyone in the choir has a fan with their name on it. Some people have entrees, some have side dishes. Barbie chooses to go up against Clemenza, and they end up with catfish and collard greens. For no reason, whatever choir member is chosen sings the ingredient. Brian takes on Kimmie because he thinks she’s the best. Pork chops and grits. Kimmie declares no one’s had grits like hers. Yup. Christina and Justin, fried chicken and mac and cheese. Dana vs. Robyn, meatloaf and sweet potato.
30 minutes to cook. Dana isn’t sure how she’s going to reinvent meatloaf. Justin has never made fried chicken. He is pounding with a frying pan. It looks like Christina took the skin off her chicken. But the skin is the best part of fried chicken! Brian says he doesn’t know how to make grits, but he also claims to be unable to read the box. Kimmie’s grits look OK, but the pot they’re in looks like it’s boiled over several times. Robyn has nutmeg and cinnamon and salt, I hope in her sweet potatoes and not the meatloaf.
Guest judge is Tanya Steel, who is the editor of Epicurious. Barbie and Clemenza are up first. Barbie did “Latin” catfish. It looks good and is tasty. Clemenza made a catfish po boy. Both of them made bacon collard greens, but Clemenza undercooked his fish so the women get a point. Kimmie and Brian come up next. Kimmie says a bunch of trash talk. She serves an oregano panko-crusted pork chop and the grits have cream, bacon, Monterey Jack and Swiss cheeses. Ramsey says it looks dull, but it tastes good. Brian has “Southern rubbed” pork chop with buttermilk brown sugar grits. They both rub it in that it looks pretty, but sadly the pork chop is raw. Much as I would like Kimmie to get shot down, she wins the point. Christina and Justin. Christina’s fried chicken has gravy and there is a fried kale chip on top of the mac and cheese. The batter is falling off the chicken and is soggy, so Justin and his chicken and lobster mac and cheese get the point. Last battle: meatloaf. Robyn has an open-faced meatloaf sandwich with sweet potato puree. The spices go over well, but apparently she didn’t mix the salt in enough. Dana wrapped her meatloaf in bacon. They say it’s “posh”, but there is too much lamb? In the end, Dana wins so the women finally win something. Out of those four, Dana’s dish is declared the best, and she’ll get her recipe on Epicurious. The prize for the team is the photo shoot prize, followed by lunch at the Four Seasons in Beverly Hills. Losers have to prep both kitchens, and the whole menu is “fine dining Southern cuisine” so it’s all brand new, plus baking bread and hand churning butter. Heh.
Watching the Blue team churn butter is hilarious. In a terribly mean twist, the photoshoot is in the dining room. Kimmie brags that she’s a “natural” beauty and doesn’t usually wear makeup or fix her hair or whatever. Oh, producers, you put that in just to be mean. I’m not going to take the bait on that one. Ramsey cracks jokes about Charlie’s Angels and stuff. The girls have a nice lunch, until Dana says her sweet potatoes were bangin’ and Barbie can’t just let it slide. She rolls her eyes and says “That’s really nice” all fake. Then she stares at Dana all creepy. Barbie claims Dana is full of herself and she’s just letting everyone know, or something. The men make rolls, as Clemenza eats some.
Dana says as long as Barbie can “check her bitch ass at the door“, they’ll have a great service. Ramsey reminds all of them they should not be making stupid mistakes. Then he hollers at Kimmie that she is key to the women doing well, as she prides herself on this style of cooking. No pressure or anything. I think what Ramsey is really saying is “You run your mouth a lot, so you’d better back it up”.
Dana interviews about how easy crab cakes are, and then in a twist for this show, she brings up nice crab cakes. The women seem to have it together so far. Brian says something about showing the oysters who is Big Daddy or something, but he brings up rubbery oysters for a first attempt. Not a twist, the second attempt is perfect. Women are already done with their appetizers. Kimmie is confident, and they all seem to be communicating, but Kimmie’s burned all the fish. Barbie gets cocky about it in confessional. Brian is trying to do well, but he’s also burned the fish. Ramsey makes him eat it, which is not a good sign, but then when he asks Brian how it tastes, instead of saying it tastes burnt, Brian says “It tastes like fish, Chef.” Oo. Wrong answer. Ramsey kicks him out, but he goes out the front. He knows he should have kept his mouth shut. The maitre d’ (I refuse to learn his name, JP forever!) stops him and tells him to go back and fight. I guess Brian was just going to keep walking and go home? He runs back in, but Ramsey is like, what are you doing here? Brian manages this time to say the fish was burnt, and promises it won’t happen again. Oh, like that wasn’t carefully arranged. Blue team is now behind. Kimmie seems to have burned her fish again, and she slaps the spatula down in anger. And splashes herself with grease. She says she’s burned really bad on one side of her face, but you can’t see it. Brian claims he doesn’t make the same mistake twice, and he doesn’t, but Robyn has now turned in raw chicken. Ramsey yells at Brian too for no reason. Justin jumps in and starts bossing everyone around.
Barbie blames Kimmie for screwing up and making everyone behind, but she promises in confessional that she’s going to be on point. This, of course, is right before the clip of her bringing up unseasoned kale. She has no explanation. Christina takes over some of the garnish station. The men’s team is not answering Ramsey, but then they seem to be ready to go. And then Robyn’s chicken is raw again. She’s pissed. Ramsey kicks the whole team out, which seems unfair. Robyn begs him to only kick her out, but he says “don’t tell me what to do” and they’re all out. Clemenza tells Robyn she was all over the place and making him crazy. Kimmie brings up catfish that is somehow both raw and burnt, so the women are all kicked out too. I would bet Ramsey and his two sous chefs can get dinner out faster than all 8 of those guys.
Kimmie claimed this is the first service she fucked up. Yeah. Clemenza comforts her. Chef Scott comes upstairs, to yell at them and tell them to go downstairs. Ramsey stops them in the back hallway and says he can’t take any more. Now he only wants one person from each team to be up for elimination, which, why did we narrow it down?
Robyn knows she served raw chicken, but then she says she didn’t get kicked out of the kitchen. I guess we’re not counting that time ALL OF THEM got kicked out. Anyway, she wants to nominate Brian. Christina wants to vote for Kimmie, but Kimmie’s argument seems to be “I splashed hot oil on myself and I didn’t leave, so don’t vote for me”. Kimmie wants to get rid of Barbie, which I can get behind also. Then we get a confessional from Barbie where she said “I am not leaving tonight, I am sure of that” so I hope that is some good foreshadowing. Dana points out that she wants to vote Barbie because Kimmie is a much better team player, but doing so makes a tie.
The women put up Kimmie, because of the fish station. The men put up Robyn, who couldn’t focus, plus raw chicken. She looks surprised, which is weird. Robyn says she’s not ready to go, and Kimmie just lost control of the fish. Kimmie also says she’s better than Robyn (to be fair, Ramsey asked her). Robyn thinks she’s better than Kimmie, and she’s letting her head get the best of her. Ramsey tells her it’s a competition, not therapy. Heh. Robyn! Back in line! Woah. Ramsey tells Kimmie she’s not ready for his restaurant. Kimmie of course feels Barbie should be going home instead. Ramsey is pissed. Robyn says some reality-show cliché about only trusting herself. Barbie is cocky.
Next time: Christina and Dana shut out Barbie, Robyn says her team sabotaged her but none of them will admit it. Something is shocking.
Thursday, July 19, 2012
Project Runway 7/19/12--"A Times Square Anniversary Party" summary
Previously on Project Runway: I wish this show would get back to where it belongs. Interesting contestants with a high skill level. I mean, Anya just learned to sew. It’s questionable. Also maybe Lifetime could learn to count weeks so they can start filming the season earlier? And airing the season earlier? So there aren’t a million decoys? (click for more)
Oh yeah, “Road to the Runway”. Nothing ever happens. There are some crazy people and some people who appear to be good. That’s about it. We’re going to see all of them again, right? Right. This hour is just so you can hear about how every single designer has a backstory. I’m not kidding. Every. Single. Designer. Their parents didn’t believe in them or they used to be poor or fat or they had a heart attack at 18 and were bullied. Why is Gunnar from last season here? It’s Josh 2.0. Anya is “working on her line”, but she is engaged, so congrats to her for that. I don’t care about people’s backstory. I mean, good for you to overcome whatever obstacles. If you can’t design or sew, then I’ll see you later.
We open in Times Square with a million people cheering and screaming. There is a fashion show going on. Or at least prep going on. Everyone discusses how crazy it is. Heidi greets the fans with Tim, Kors, and Nina. The designers come up on stage to get champagne so they can toast season 10.
Then we go back to “One Day Earlier”. Oh, come ON. You couldn’t have started there? Why waste two minutes on Times Square? Why the stupid gimmick? This is not a good start. Everyone arrives from various directions. Buffi has a British accent and has loud clothes. Gunnar is back, and he seems to have actually made it on the show this time. Inside Parsons, each station has an outfit already on it. Everyone was tasked to make an outfit that “describes our design aesthetic”. Gunnar thinks his design aesthetic is Cruella DeVille. Lantie has her own design studio. Elena designs for edgy girls. Kooan (the guy with a fro) has a romper with big blue circles and pink plastic on the shoulders. He’s weird. Melissa thought she was going to be a lawyer but decided that people in poly sci are not “my people” so she bailed. Everything is black. Ven has a gorgeous white pantsuit with a dark red ruffled top.
Tim appears and everyone cheers. He explains their touch screen tablets and the sewing room, and how the accessory wall is now Lord & Taylor. For the first challenge, you must make a companion piece for the outfit you brought. $100 at Mood. Tim then tells them the runway show will be in Times Square.
30 minutes to sketch. Christopher tells us he dropped out of college, but he has talent and a portfolio. He says he’s really confident as if he needs to convince himself, as the editors splice in a bunch of shots of him tearing out his sketch and starting over. Alicia designs for tomboys. Beatrice says her first look, the one she brought, took her four days to make. Jeez, ANOTHER one? Sad. Mood is fun. Swatch! Raul usually designs menswear.
Someone has put photos on the wall of all the winners. I miss Jay. Shit, I miss Jeffery. Andrea declares herself “the old fart”, and is a fashion professor. Gunnar and Christopher have a pissy argument, I guess because Gunnar thinks Chris is making fun of him. Well he probably was, but now you look like a brat so…good for you? Gunnar thinks Chris is too close to his personality, and then says “There’s only room for one star”. No, there’s only room for one flamey stereotypical gay boy. Imagine if last season there were two Joshs. You know which Josh I mean. Raul says his fabric is not working. When he tries to sew it, all the stitches fall out. Sonjia has a cropped pixie haircut which is dyed blue. She says aloud how nice it is that everyone is nice to each other for now. Fabio agrees. Fabio grew up with his grandmother, who was the local seamstress. Also he is a freegan, which means you only eat what you can scrounge for free from dumpsters. Buffi says she just invented a diet called “fegan”, which is fake vegan, so you eat whatever. OK, that was fun. Dmitry would like a quiet workroom so he is already irritated at Buffi. Chris is having problems with the sewing machine. The lounge has photos of past seasons. Dmitry tells everyone he used to be a professional ballroom dancer, and got his fashion start making the costumes.
Tim time! Melissa tells Tim about her dress and gets an “I’m intrigued”. Sonjia has a great jacket, but Tim doesn’t get it with the dress she has. Buffi has a gang of colors and like, one leg. Kooan has really confused Tim. Seriously he is wringing his hands. Beatrice talks about knits and a sweater dress. Tim has actual advice, so we’ll see. Fabio has made a skirt, and Tim just comes out and tells him that compared to his first look, his skirt is a throwaway. Gunnar gets really giggly around Tim. Lantie has a dress made of beige lace and another top with snakeskin down the front. Elena asks Tim’s advice about colors, and he just says she needs to commit and execute. Tim (and everyone else) is impressed with Ven’s skills. Andrea has some black and white stripes. Raul has a sheer fabric, and Tim points out he’ll have to tell his model to wear granny panties or something. Gunnar smirks that Raul is “getting eaten alive”. That’s why I don’t like him. Tim doesn’t “eat people alive”. Chris has a great black dress, but his new dress got ruined by the sewing machine. Tim gives him some confidence.
Three hours left. Buffi is wearing sequined blue hot pants and hot pink leggings. Kooan is too hot and he wants to shave off his fro. Beatrice is in trouble, because she has no sewing skills. Gunnar and Chris continue to have their pissy fight, apparently because Chris can’t recognize that they’re like, the same person. Sadly, Gunnar can’t just be pissy back, he has to escalate and tell Chris to shut the fuck up. Chris says Gunnar should be on “Toddlers and Tiaras”. Hee!
Model fitting. Chris thinks he’s screwed because the model is two inches smaller than the form. He completely disassembles his garment, and then forgets how it goes back together. Lantie hates her dress. Some frantic running. There are some shots of the disaster area workroom, as if previous seasons never left a mess and always had enough time to do everything.
The designers get to the apartments. Everyone talks about how freaked out they are.
In the morning everyone comes back in to frantically finish everything. Tim gives everyone two hours. Hot makeup guy! He’s getting a ton of screen time. Good. Beatrice is freaking out. She’s put a hole in her top somehow. Doesn’t seem to be a lot of last minute work that Tim has to stop.
Guest judges are Lauren Graham and Patricia Field, who was the first guest judge ever. Nice. Ven: his original look is a white pantsuit with a dark pink top, with folds and what looks like a rose in the center. It’s great, I really like it. Very wide legs. The second look is a pink shift dress with similar folds in the skirt. Beatrice: original look is a weird stripy poncho or shawl, and a simple T-shirt dress with a split neckline in gray. New look is a red pleather sleeveless tunic and a gray pencil skirt with a mullet hem. Knee length in front and floor length in back. It might not be pleather but it’s shiny. There’s also a wide gold belt. Lantie: original look is tan floral lace with a shawl kind of jacket and a collar. You know, one of those tops where there’s a collar and then a strip down the front. I think there are rosettes. New look is a gray or tan dress with an overlay of dusty rose tulle. There’s a big necklace or some kind of piece (the snakeskin?) down the front. It’s not good. Andrea: original look is a tea-length white dress with black stripes, only the stripes are only on the front panel, they don’t go all the way around the dress. The top is a plain spaghetti strap top. I think the skirt looks like there’s a hoop in the bottom, and then a slightly longer skirt underneath? New look: short cocktail dress, sleeveless with a boat neck. The bodice is in black, and the skirt is black and white stripes. There’s some kind of hoop or something at her hips so the skirt is stiff. In the back there’s a big bow at her shoulders. Chris: his original look is a black strapless cocktail dress with a sweetheart neckline. I think there is supposed to be some texture detail, but it’s kind of lost on the runway. Gah! Exposed zipper! New look: long gown, with thin straps and a long floaty train. It’s slit up the front but as she walks the back floats down behind her. The whole think is in a chocolate brown, and there are ruffles in it. It looks good, actually. Better than I expected. Alicia: red jumpsuit, sleeveless and with Capri pants. And a hood. The new look is a sleeveless top in white and red, with a diagonal seam between the two, and skinny brown pants with a super low crotch. The back of the top has vertical seams. Elena: her original look is a black coat dress, with panniers at her hips, all in a heavy quilted fabric. She said she was inspired by fencing outfits. The new look is a sleek black dress, with a white panel in the front and over her boobs, and long sleeves that look like they have fins on them? There is a strip of fabric running down each arm. Buffi: short gray dress in shiny material, all draped, with a pink scarf or inset in the top. The second look is a big pink top, like a poncho, in hot pink with bright green lining. It’s belted and there are skinny pants.
Dmitry: long sequined gown, with elbow-length sleeves and a black matte corset over the top of it. New look: short gray dress with one shoulder and a black belt. just above the belt on one side there is a strip of skin. Kooan: his weird jumpsuit with the circles and a print shirt underneath. Kors and Nina laugh. New look: short shirt dress with cap sleeves, in a shiny gray-purple. It’s cut like a smock. Gunnar: original look is a chartreuse sheath dress, with a black belt and a black vertical stripe down the front and a high collar. New look is the same top, same colors, and a skirt and jacket in a white print. Nathan: who? Exactly. One look is a green jumpsuit, all gathered at the navel but not really tight anywhere else, and a coral gown with a ton of volume and an open back. Sonjia: brown leather jacket, that I thought was just open, but the model is shirtless so it must fasten just over her boobs. The pants are leopard print with a neon yellow waistband. New look is a short yellow dress. Over the dress is a drape of leopard print flowy fabric, draped over one shoulder and longer than the dress on the opposite side. Over all of that is a black leather vest. Melissa: new look is a black dress, one shouldered and very short on the other side, with a fishtail hem. Original look is a black leather jacket and long skirt. The jacket buttons like a chef’s jacket. Raul: gray pantsuit and a pink sheer top with a floppy bow. It looks good. New look is a short pink dress with a ton of ruffles. It is no longer sheer. Fabio: new piece is a black top with cap sleeves and a wrap skirt that fades from brown to white. The original look is a black dress with a seam up the front, or maybe buttons. One side is sleeveless and one has a short sleeve.
God, it’s finally over. Back on the runway, Heidi says she was impressed. Heidi reminds them of the prize, which of course involves Lord and Taylor now instead of Piperlime or Macy’s. Kooan, Ven, Lantie, Chris, Beatrice, and Melissa are called out. Everyone else is safe. Everyone seems to be just fine with being in the middle and being safe.
Kooan says his first look is what he started doing when he first became a designer, and the new one is more what he’s doing now. Heidi is intrigued but also confused. Kors warns him about being a joke, but it’s obvious he can sew. Nina also doesn’t want him to be weird just to be weird. I can’t tell if they are OK with it or if he’s on the bottom. Melissa wanted geometric angles and asymmetry. They like it, and they can immediately see it’s her work. Kors wants more than just black. Gonna be disappointed, Kors. Beatrice’s shawl has fur trim. No one is impressed. Heidi says her clothes are sad. Kors busts out the complaint that they don’t know who she is or who her client is. I get that’s a valid complaint, but I feel like the judges use it just to complain about whoever they feel like. Chris says something about material no one’s seen before, and Heidi loves his gown, but she also says black dresses never translate well on the runway. Kors doesn’t like the styling. Lantie has real snakeskin in her designs. The new dress has the snakeskin stuck on the front, and it’s kind of bunched up so it doesn’t look as good as the other dress. The new dress isn’t that great, and Kors doesn’t think there’s any story but a textile story, and the textiles aren’t so hot. Nina thinks she was trying too hard. Ven’s two designs work very well together. They love the flower on his original look. He clearly has construction skills.
Melissa’s scores were high, but not as high as Ven’s or Chris’s. They do like the youth of her clothes and how you know exactly who her client is. Chris’s gown was an old lady fabric in a young gown. They love that gown. Ven’s suit was fantastic, fit beautifully and looked expensive. Kooan is weird, and they’re afraid he will only make joke clothes. Heidi thinks he was just nervous, but Nina doesn’t agree. Beatrice tried very hard to sell her clothes, but her new outfit was not so great and neither was her shawl. Kors says something about Snuggies. Lantie had some vintage clothes, but she couldn’t recreate it in her new look. Lantie at least seems to have stood behind her clothes.
Chris is the winner. Huh. Ven is in. Melissa is in. Kooan is in. He is loud about it. Lantie is in. Well well well. They got rid of the person with poor sewing skills. Good. Beatrice says she tried to push herself but maybe she shouldn’t have. She enjoyed all of her time here, all one day.
This season: Rockettes, cars, candy store, I think Tim curses, someone runs away in the middle of the night, team drama. The usual. But I do know someone really did run away, just packed up and left in the middle of the night. And someone else has a breakdown and they quit. So that should be interesting.
Oh yeah, “Road to the Runway”. Nothing ever happens. There are some crazy people and some people who appear to be good. That’s about it. We’re going to see all of them again, right? Right. This hour is just so you can hear about how every single designer has a backstory. I’m not kidding. Every. Single. Designer. Their parents didn’t believe in them or they used to be poor or fat or they had a heart attack at 18 and were bullied. Why is Gunnar from last season here? It’s Josh 2.0. Anya is “working on her line”, but she is engaged, so congrats to her for that. I don’t care about people’s backstory. I mean, good for you to overcome whatever obstacles. If you can’t design or sew, then I’ll see you later.
We open in Times Square with a million people cheering and screaming. There is a fashion show going on. Or at least prep going on. Everyone discusses how crazy it is. Heidi greets the fans with Tim, Kors, and Nina. The designers come up on stage to get champagne so they can toast season 10.
Then we go back to “One Day Earlier”. Oh, come ON. You couldn’t have started there? Why waste two minutes on Times Square? Why the stupid gimmick? This is not a good start. Everyone arrives from various directions. Buffi has a British accent and has loud clothes. Gunnar is back, and he seems to have actually made it on the show this time. Inside Parsons, each station has an outfit already on it. Everyone was tasked to make an outfit that “describes our design aesthetic”. Gunnar thinks his design aesthetic is Cruella DeVille. Lantie has her own design studio. Elena designs for edgy girls. Kooan (the guy with a fro) has a romper with big blue circles and pink plastic on the shoulders. He’s weird. Melissa thought she was going to be a lawyer but decided that people in poly sci are not “my people” so she bailed. Everything is black. Ven has a gorgeous white pantsuit with a dark red ruffled top.
Tim appears and everyone cheers. He explains their touch screen tablets and the sewing room, and how the accessory wall is now Lord & Taylor. For the first challenge, you must make a companion piece for the outfit you brought. $100 at Mood. Tim then tells them the runway show will be in Times Square.
30 minutes to sketch. Christopher tells us he dropped out of college, but he has talent and a portfolio. He says he’s really confident as if he needs to convince himself, as the editors splice in a bunch of shots of him tearing out his sketch and starting over. Alicia designs for tomboys. Beatrice says her first look, the one she brought, took her four days to make. Jeez, ANOTHER one? Sad. Mood is fun. Swatch! Raul usually designs menswear.
Someone has put photos on the wall of all the winners. I miss Jay. Shit, I miss Jeffery. Andrea declares herself “the old fart”, and is a fashion professor. Gunnar and Christopher have a pissy argument, I guess because Gunnar thinks Chris is making fun of him. Well he probably was, but now you look like a brat so…good for you? Gunnar thinks Chris is too close to his personality, and then says “There’s only room for one star”. No, there’s only room for one flamey stereotypical gay boy. Imagine if last season there were two Joshs. You know which Josh I mean. Raul says his fabric is not working. When he tries to sew it, all the stitches fall out. Sonjia has a cropped pixie haircut which is dyed blue. She says aloud how nice it is that everyone is nice to each other for now. Fabio agrees. Fabio grew up with his grandmother, who was the local seamstress. Also he is a freegan, which means you only eat what you can scrounge for free from dumpsters. Buffi says she just invented a diet called “fegan”, which is fake vegan, so you eat whatever. OK, that was fun. Dmitry would like a quiet workroom so he is already irritated at Buffi. Chris is having problems with the sewing machine. The lounge has photos of past seasons. Dmitry tells everyone he used to be a professional ballroom dancer, and got his fashion start making the costumes.
Tim time! Melissa tells Tim about her dress and gets an “I’m intrigued”. Sonjia has a great jacket, but Tim doesn’t get it with the dress she has. Buffi has a gang of colors and like, one leg. Kooan has really confused Tim. Seriously he is wringing his hands. Beatrice talks about knits and a sweater dress. Tim has actual advice, so we’ll see. Fabio has made a skirt, and Tim just comes out and tells him that compared to his first look, his skirt is a throwaway. Gunnar gets really giggly around Tim. Lantie has a dress made of beige lace and another top with snakeskin down the front. Elena asks Tim’s advice about colors, and he just says she needs to commit and execute. Tim (and everyone else) is impressed with Ven’s skills. Andrea has some black and white stripes. Raul has a sheer fabric, and Tim points out he’ll have to tell his model to wear granny panties or something. Gunnar smirks that Raul is “getting eaten alive”. That’s why I don’t like him. Tim doesn’t “eat people alive”. Chris has a great black dress, but his new dress got ruined by the sewing machine. Tim gives him some confidence.
Three hours left. Buffi is wearing sequined blue hot pants and hot pink leggings. Kooan is too hot and he wants to shave off his fro. Beatrice is in trouble, because she has no sewing skills. Gunnar and Chris continue to have their pissy fight, apparently because Chris can’t recognize that they’re like, the same person. Sadly, Gunnar can’t just be pissy back, he has to escalate and tell Chris to shut the fuck up. Chris says Gunnar should be on “Toddlers and Tiaras”. Hee!
Model fitting. Chris thinks he’s screwed because the model is two inches smaller than the form. He completely disassembles his garment, and then forgets how it goes back together. Lantie hates her dress. Some frantic running. There are some shots of the disaster area workroom, as if previous seasons never left a mess and always had enough time to do everything.
The designers get to the apartments. Everyone talks about how freaked out they are.
In the morning everyone comes back in to frantically finish everything. Tim gives everyone two hours. Hot makeup guy! He’s getting a ton of screen time. Good. Beatrice is freaking out. She’s put a hole in her top somehow. Doesn’t seem to be a lot of last minute work that Tim has to stop.
Guest judges are Lauren Graham and Patricia Field, who was the first guest judge ever. Nice. Ven: his original look is a white pantsuit with a dark pink top, with folds and what looks like a rose in the center. It’s great, I really like it. Very wide legs. The second look is a pink shift dress with similar folds in the skirt. Beatrice: original look is a weird stripy poncho or shawl, and a simple T-shirt dress with a split neckline in gray. New look is a red pleather sleeveless tunic and a gray pencil skirt with a mullet hem. Knee length in front and floor length in back. It might not be pleather but it’s shiny. There’s also a wide gold belt. Lantie: original look is tan floral lace with a shawl kind of jacket and a collar. You know, one of those tops where there’s a collar and then a strip down the front. I think there are rosettes. New look is a gray or tan dress with an overlay of dusty rose tulle. There’s a big necklace or some kind of piece (the snakeskin?) down the front. It’s not good. Andrea: original look is a tea-length white dress with black stripes, only the stripes are only on the front panel, they don’t go all the way around the dress. The top is a plain spaghetti strap top. I think the skirt looks like there’s a hoop in the bottom, and then a slightly longer skirt underneath? New look: short cocktail dress, sleeveless with a boat neck. The bodice is in black, and the skirt is black and white stripes. There’s some kind of hoop or something at her hips so the skirt is stiff. In the back there’s a big bow at her shoulders. Chris: his original look is a black strapless cocktail dress with a sweetheart neckline. I think there is supposed to be some texture detail, but it’s kind of lost on the runway. Gah! Exposed zipper! New look: long gown, with thin straps and a long floaty train. It’s slit up the front but as she walks the back floats down behind her. The whole think is in a chocolate brown, and there are ruffles in it. It looks good, actually. Better than I expected. Alicia: red jumpsuit, sleeveless and with Capri pants. And a hood. The new look is a sleeveless top in white and red, with a diagonal seam between the two, and skinny brown pants with a super low crotch. The back of the top has vertical seams. Elena: her original look is a black coat dress, with panniers at her hips, all in a heavy quilted fabric. She said she was inspired by fencing outfits. The new look is a sleek black dress, with a white panel in the front and over her boobs, and long sleeves that look like they have fins on them? There is a strip of fabric running down each arm. Buffi: short gray dress in shiny material, all draped, with a pink scarf or inset in the top. The second look is a big pink top, like a poncho, in hot pink with bright green lining. It’s belted and there are skinny pants.
Dmitry: long sequined gown, with elbow-length sleeves and a black matte corset over the top of it. New look: short gray dress with one shoulder and a black belt. just above the belt on one side there is a strip of skin. Kooan: his weird jumpsuit with the circles and a print shirt underneath. Kors and Nina laugh. New look: short shirt dress with cap sleeves, in a shiny gray-purple. It’s cut like a smock. Gunnar: original look is a chartreuse sheath dress, with a black belt and a black vertical stripe down the front and a high collar. New look is the same top, same colors, and a skirt and jacket in a white print. Nathan: who? Exactly. One look is a green jumpsuit, all gathered at the navel but not really tight anywhere else, and a coral gown with a ton of volume and an open back. Sonjia: brown leather jacket, that I thought was just open, but the model is shirtless so it must fasten just over her boobs. The pants are leopard print with a neon yellow waistband. New look is a short yellow dress. Over the dress is a drape of leopard print flowy fabric, draped over one shoulder and longer than the dress on the opposite side. Over all of that is a black leather vest. Melissa: new look is a black dress, one shouldered and very short on the other side, with a fishtail hem. Original look is a black leather jacket and long skirt. The jacket buttons like a chef’s jacket. Raul: gray pantsuit and a pink sheer top with a floppy bow. It looks good. New look is a short pink dress with a ton of ruffles. It is no longer sheer. Fabio: new piece is a black top with cap sleeves and a wrap skirt that fades from brown to white. The original look is a black dress with a seam up the front, or maybe buttons. One side is sleeveless and one has a short sleeve.
God, it’s finally over. Back on the runway, Heidi says she was impressed. Heidi reminds them of the prize, which of course involves Lord and Taylor now instead of Piperlime or Macy’s. Kooan, Ven, Lantie, Chris, Beatrice, and Melissa are called out. Everyone else is safe. Everyone seems to be just fine with being in the middle and being safe.
Kooan says his first look is what he started doing when he first became a designer, and the new one is more what he’s doing now. Heidi is intrigued but also confused. Kors warns him about being a joke, but it’s obvious he can sew. Nina also doesn’t want him to be weird just to be weird. I can’t tell if they are OK with it or if he’s on the bottom. Melissa wanted geometric angles and asymmetry. They like it, and they can immediately see it’s her work. Kors wants more than just black. Gonna be disappointed, Kors. Beatrice’s shawl has fur trim. No one is impressed. Heidi says her clothes are sad. Kors busts out the complaint that they don’t know who she is or who her client is. I get that’s a valid complaint, but I feel like the judges use it just to complain about whoever they feel like. Chris says something about material no one’s seen before, and Heidi loves his gown, but she also says black dresses never translate well on the runway. Kors doesn’t like the styling. Lantie has real snakeskin in her designs. The new dress has the snakeskin stuck on the front, and it’s kind of bunched up so it doesn’t look as good as the other dress. The new dress isn’t that great, and Kors doesn’t think there’s any story but a textile story, and the textiles aren’t so hot. Nina thinks she was trying too hard. Ven’s two designs work very well together. They love the flower on his original look. He clearly has construction skills.
Melissa’s scores were high, but not as high as Ven’s or Chris’s. They do like the youth of her clothes and how you know exactly who her client is. Chris’s gown was an old lady fabric in a young gown. They love that gown. Ven’s suit was fantastic, fit beautifully and looked expensive. Kooan is weird, and they’re afraid he will only make joke clothes. Heidi thinks he was just nervous, but Nina doesn’t agree. Beatrice tried very hard to sell her clothes, but her new outfit was not so great and neither was her shawl. Kors says something about Snuggies. Lantie had some vintage clothes, but she couldn’t recreate it in her new look. Lantie at least seems to have stood behind her clothes.
Chris is the winner. Huh. Ven is in. Melissa is in. Kooan is in. He is loud about it. Lantie is in. Well well well. They got rid of the person with poor sewing skills. Good. Beatrice says she tried to push herself but maybe she shouldn’t have. She enjoyed all of her time here, all one day.
This season: Rockettes, cars, candy store, I think Tim curses, someone runs away in the middle of the night, team drama. The usual. But I do know someone really did run away, just packed up and left in the middle of the night. And someone else has a breakdown and they quit. So that should be interesting.
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
Hell's Kitchen 7/17/12--"8 Chefs Compete" summary
Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: an eating challenge. For no reason. Then the blind taste test, which everyone always fails. Except Justin, he got all his foods correct. And Kimmie, because she’d rather volunteer to sit out and then bitch about how everyone else sucks. Barbie and Kimmie sort of get into it, but Kimmie is not threatening, unless you’re threatened by crying. The teams have to come up with menus, and Kimmie is shot down, sort of, and also Robyn. The menus are OK, and mostly pass muster with Ramsey (no thanks to Barbie spending forever cleaning mussels or Clemenza spending forever cleaning his jacket). However, Clemenza has just served quail that hasn’t been boned properly and Ramsey is not happy. (click for more)
What’s with all the two part episodes this season? Why are we stretching things out so much? Anyway, Clemenza quickly confirms that he is not giving up. Well…points for carefully editing the previews so he didn’t show up in any of them. I still don’t know why it says EIGHT chefs compete. The women are also planning on how to improve their menu. Small fixes for both, it seems. Ramsey says no excuses. Justin doesn’t think the women’s team is any better than his own, just that his team can’t get their shit together. Agreed.
There are diner comment cards, but it looks like you can’t pick the menu you want. It just depends on where you’re seated, like any other night. Everyone is ordering flatbread so Christina’s slammed. She gets yelled at, sort of, and asks for help. Barbie feels that Christina only asked for help because she fails, not because she was too busy and Barbie wasn’t doing anything. Robyn is supposed to be cooking squash blossoms stuffed with scallop and lobster mousse, which is Justin’s dish. She jacks it up, and it sounds like in confessional that she blames Justin for making up something so complicated. Justin tells Robyn to cook them all the way through (duh), and she tells him he told her five minutes, so she cooked them for five minutes. Justin of course is like “Do you know how to cook?” as if he wouldn’t be on her case if she cooked them for too long on her own. Now they are overcooked. Robyn has to make more.
The women are moving quickly. Barbie asks Kimmie if she needs help, and Kimmie says no. So far, everyone is polite and professional. Barbie ruins it by interviewing that she offered and was refused so forget it. It looks like right after saying she was fine, Kimmie tells Barbie to take some steaks out of the oven. But it’s followed by confessional from Kimmie about how she doesn’t need help? Maybe she was talking to Christina. Anyway, Kimmie’s steak is overcooked, Ramsey makes everyone taste it, they all say it’s overcooked, Kimmie curses in confessional about how they shouldn’t taste her food and tell her what’s wrong with it. What? It’s obviously not right. Barbie interviews that she offered and she can cook meat and duck. Yes, but can you SHUT UP? I can’t believe she’s coasted this long when even Kimmie is a better team member. Hell, Robyn was a better team member when she was on that team and everyone hated her. Speaking of Robyn, she’s run out of squash blossoms. She blames Justin, but she ruined at least two orders that we saw so I’m going to agree with Justin on this one. She has to go explain to the tables what’s going on.
Men and Robyn move on to entrees. Kimmie’s meat is cooked properly, and she says the meat station has to be right because if the meat station screws up, it screws up garnish and fish. Then she brings up overcooked rib eye. Ramsey makes her promise she’s not given up. He yells, and she’s got this sarcastic “Oh my God you’re yelling at me AGAIN” look on her face. Like the camera caught her mid-eye roll. I would kick her out just for that. Ramsey says he doesn’t care if the whole team goes home. Good idea. Finally she gets it together.
Justin and Clemenza try to get out their first table of entrees, but there aren’t any onions for the steak. Brian just forgot. Then he brings up like, a soggy tangle. Finally they are good. Dana is putting out excellent halibut but raw lobster. Dana explains (only to us, not to Ramsey) that she thought the lobster claws at her station were already fully cooked and she just needed to reheat them. Justin is taking charge, but Clemenza seems to be lagging. He at least is not talking. Clemenza is offended, but if Justin can get them to not fail like they’ve been doing, then good for him. All of a sudden, Ramsey stops the women to point out that Tiffany has taken a pan, dumped the scraps in the trash, and then put more garnish in the pan. I guess you’re supposed to use a new pan? I mean, I reuse pans like that all the time, but I at least rinse them first. Also I am cooking just for me and I don’t care. Everyone interviews that she’s gross. Ramsey yells orders at the men, and Justin responds, but Clemenza doesn’t. Justin tries to confirm with him, but he’s gotten the number wrong, and he’s just pissed at Justin. This isn’t the first time Clemenza has screwed up the orders for lack of counting. I wonder if he just doesn’t have restaurant experience. Clemenza tries to say he has it, but then he just admits he didn’t understand. Justin pulls him off fish.
Remember yesterday Tiffany was making potatoes and they were raw? And Dana told her so, and she insisted they’d be fine once they were cool? Yeah…didn’t happen. And they are getting sent back. Tiffany has the balls to whine in confessional that she would just like to get done with service, and all Ramsey has to do is put the potatoes in a pan, it’s not that hard. Wow. Ramsey accuses her of not caring, and she says she does, but she rolls her eyes at the same time so the camera catches her with her eyes on the ceiling. Tiffany swears she cares about food more than she cares about her family, which is completely insane and scary. She also doesn’t have any sense, because she’s bitching to Dana that she’s been serving the same potatoes all night and they’ve been fine. Dana reminds her they were raw before, and Tiffany is like “I put them back in the oven!” Then she bitches to everyone that she needs ten minutes to recook her potatoes that she put up already, or whatever. She’s just delusional.
Justin has taken charge, but he’s overcooked steaks. He thinks it’s close enough, just barely over, and Robyn for some reason is insisting they all need to help each other. I don’t know what brought that on. Now it will be six minutes, but Ramsey doesn’t believe him for some reason. Justin tries to throw Clemenza under the bus, saying he doesn’t know what’s up with the fish, but that doesn’t really work either. Tiffany is taking her potatoes out of the little cast iron casseroles they were being served in and putting them in a pan to finish cooking them. But are you going to put them back in the oven? That’s the best part of a gratin, the potatoes are all baked together and crispy on top. She also has no idea how long it will take, and Christina can’t resist needling her in confessional about how this gratin was all Tiffany’s idea. She tells Kimmie she has no idea, what do you want her to say, shrugging. Andi comes over, and Tiffany quickly says she’s sorry, because teacher has seen her being a brat. Andi rockets to the top of my list of sous chefs on this show, right under Scott, because the first words out of her mouth are “You’re not sorry.” Love it. Andi calls her sloppy, calls her on her attitude enough times that Tiffany finally says “OK, I’m not sorry” and then KICKS HER OUT. OK, she sends her to take a break, which means she can come back, but it was so great. Now Tiffany’s crying about how everyone made fun of her and made her look like an idiot. Did it to yourself. Dana has been put in charge of the potatoes, but she can’t get them to cook. The men are on the last table, somehow, but Brian tells Ramsey the sea bass wasn’t right so he’s recooking it. Somehow this pisses Ramsey off and then he spies Clemenza eating so now they’re all getting yelled at. So the men’s team gets kicked out. Aww, so close.
When they get back to the dorms, Justin and Clemenza immediately start yelling at each other about Clemenza not knowing how many fish were up or whatever. Scott and Ramsey finish the last table, and the women finally get done. They realize the men have been kicked out, and Tiffany says so, as she’s finally returned. Dana points out that they know that even if they’ve lost, so did the men.
Ramsey produces the comment cards. But he tears them up, because he can’t get over the fact that the teams came up with their own menus and still couldn’t get it done. There is no winning team. Everyone come up with two people.
Justin quickly puts up Robyn, and Brian follows. Robyn of course puts up Justin, because she thinks he told her the wrong thing about his dish and screwed her. Also she asked for help and he said he was too busy, mainly because he didn’t think she should need any help. Any points Robyn might have gotten from me fly out the window because she is complaining to Justin that the squash blossoms were all different sizes. As if that’s his fault. Clemenza doesn’t like Robyn, but he also doesn’t like Justin. He votes for Robyn. Dana votes for Tiffany, who says she was “set up”. What? Everyone is voting for Tiffany. Dana and Kimmie want to also vote for Barbie, for taking so long in prep. Kimmie pauses in her litany of things she hates about Barbie, so Barbie steps in to defend herself, and Kimmie gets bitchy about being interrupted. Whatever. I will note though, Barbie says she prepped the lobster that screwed Dana. Dana calls Barbie on making faces at everyone and having attitude, and Barbie makes faces in confessional. Tiffany doesn’t want to vote at first, but then she votes for Kimmie and Barbie. Christina has to pick between Barbie and Kimmie for her second vote, and it seems to be a choice for her between Kimmie’s constant questioning of things and Barbie’s attitude. The other team is at a standstill because they can’t agree on the second vote. Everyone voted for Robyn, but they seem to be tied between Brian and Clemenza.
The men’s team puts up Robyn. She smirks and tells Ramsey Justin wouldn’t help her. Oh, Robyn, you are digging your own grave. Justin says he doesn’t want to deal with her, and he’s embarrassed she’s still talking. Brian then says Clemenza is up because of the fish and that he “got his ass handed to him during prep”. Huh? Oh, because he went to clean his jacket. Still. The women put up Tiffany for failed potatoes and Barbie for slow prep. Barbie MAKES A FACE. Seriously, you’ve been told everyone knows you have an attitude because you make faces all the time, and then in response you make bitchy faces. Ramsey does not change the nominees. Tiffany says she’s a team player and she loves working with these women, and she starts crying, and she wants to stay. She swears she has passion, but Ramsey says she’s not standing out. Barbie swears she has been a team player (everyone behind her laughs) but then she says the only person that matters to her is Ramsey. Clemenza swears he didn’t lie, he just didn’t understand Ramsey. He doesn’t think he had that many problems. Ramsey knows Robyn isn’t a team player, because she’s nominated again. She’s trying valiantly to save herself, but Ramsey points out he doesn’t have another team to put her on. Robyn swears that tomorrow is a new day and she’ll be fine tomorrow, but I doubt it. Justin shakes his head. Tiffany is eliminated. She is not a leader. She wishes she could have made it further. Clemenza! Back in line! Everyone back in line! Kimmie is crying. Ramsey warns them that he can’t wait any longer for them, and if they don’t fix it, he’ll have to start getting rid of them more quickly. And since the season finale seems to be in two weeks, he’s going to have to. Kimmie promises to fight for Tiffany, and Justin is tired of Robyn. Barbie says she’ll be around more, which sucks.
Next time: southern food and gospel music. Kimmie fails, after all her big talk about all her comfort food, which is somehow not surprising. Brian makes smart ass comments. Also it looks like he gets kicked out in the middle of service.
What’s with all the two part episodes this season? Why are we stretching things out so much? Anyway, Clemenza quickly confirms that he is not giving up. Well…points for carefully editing the previews so he didn’t show up in any of them. I still don’t know why it says EIGHT chefs compete. The women are also planning on how to improve their menu. Small fixes for both, it seems. Ramsey says no excuses. Justin doesn’t think the women’s team is any better than his own, just that his team can’t get their shit together. Agreed.
There are diner comment cards, but it looks like you can’t pick the menu you want. It just depends on where you’re seated, like any other night. Everyone is ordering flatbread so Christina’s slammed. She gets yelled at, sort of, and asks for help. Barbie feels that Christina only asked for help because she fails, not because she was too busy and Barbie wasn’t doing anything. Robyn is supposed to be cooking squash blossoms stuffed with scallop and lobster mousse, which is Justin’s dish. She jacks it up, and it sounds like in confessional that she blames Justin for making up something so complicated. Justin tells Robyn to cook them all the way through (duh), and she tells him he told her five minutes, so she cooked them for five minutes. Justin of course is like “Do you know how to cook?” as if he wouldn’t be on her case if she cooked them for too long on her own. Now they are overcooked. Robyn has to make more.
The women are moving quickly. Barbie asks Kimmie if she needs help, and Kimmie says no. So far, everyone is polite and professional. Barbie ruins it by interviewing that she offered and was refused so forget it. It looks like right after saying she was fine, Kimmie tells Barbie to take some steaks out of the oven. But it’s followed by confessional from Kimmie about how she doesn’t need help? Maybe she was talking to Christina. Anyway, Kimmie’s steak is overcooked, Ramsey makes everyone taste it, they all say it’s overcooked, Kimmie curses in confessional about how they shouldn’t taste her food and tell her what’s wrong with it. What? It’s obviously not right. Barbie interviews that she offered and she can cook meat and duck. Yes, but can you SHUT UP? I can’t believe she’s coasted this long when even Kimmie is a better team member. Hell, Robyn was a better team member when she was on that team and everyone hated her. Speaking of Robyn, she’s run out of squash blossoms. She blames Justin, but she ruined at least two orders that we saw so I’m going to agree with Justin on this one. She has to go explain to the tables what’s going on.
Men and Robyn move on to entrees. Kimmie’s meat is cooked properly, and she says the meat station has to be right because if the meat station screws up, it screws up garnish and fish. Then she brings up overcooked rib eye. Ramsey makes her promise she’s not given up. He yells, and she’s got this sarcastic “Oh my God you’re yelling at me AGAIN” look on her face. Like the camera caught her mid-eye roll. I would kick her out just for that. Ramsey says he doesn’t care if the whole team goes home. Good idea. Finally she gets it together.
Justin and Clemenza try to get out their first table of entrees, but there aren’t any onions for the steak. Brian just forgot. Then he brings up like, a soggy tangle. Finally they are good. Dana is putting out excellent halibut but raw lobster. Dana explains (only to us, not to Ramsey) that she thought the lobster claws at her station were already fully cooked and she just needed to reheat them. Justin is taking charge, but Clemenza seems to be lagging. He at least is not talking. Clemenza is offended, but if Justin can get them to not fail like they’ve been doing, then good for him. All of a sudden, Ramsey stops the women to point out that Tiffany has taken a pan, dumped the scraps in the trash, and then put more garnish in the pan. I guess you’re supposed to use a new pan? I mean, I reuse pans like that all the time, but I at least rinse them first. Also I am cooking just for me and I don’t care. Everyone interviews that she’s gross. Ramsey yells orders at the men, and Justin responds, but Clemenza doesn’t. Justin tries to confirm with him, but he’s gotten the number wrong, and he’s just pissed at Justin. This isn’t the first time Clemenza has screwed up the orders for lack of counting. I wonder if he just doesn’t have restaurant experience. Clemenza tries to say he has it, but then he just admits he didn’t understand. Justin pulls him off fish.
Remember yesterday Tiffany was making potatoes and they were raw? And Dana told her so, and she insisted they’d be fine once they were cool? Yeah…didn’t happen. And they are getting sent back. Tiffany has the balls to whine in confessional that she would just like to get done with service, and all Ramsey has to do is put the potatoes in a pan, it’s not that hard. Wow. Ramsey accuses her of not caring, and she says she does, but she rolls her eyes at the same time so the camera catches her with her eyes on the ceiling. Tiffany swears she cares about food more than she cares about her family, which is completely insane and scary. She also doesn’t have any sense, because she’s bitching to Dana that she’s been serving the same potatoes all night and they’ve been fine. Dana reminds her they were raw before, and Tiffany is like “I put them back in the oven!” Then she bitches to everyone that she needs ten minutes to recook her potatoes that she put up already, or whatever. She’s just delusional.
Justin has taken charge, but he’s overcooked steaks. He thinks it’s close enough, just barely over, and Robyn for some reason is insisting they all need to help each other. I don’t know what brought that on. Now it will be six minutes, but Ramsey doesn’t believe him for some reason. Justin tries to throw Clemenza under the bus, saying he doesn’t know what’s up with the fish, but that doesn’t really work either. Tiffany is taking her potatoes out of the little cast iron casseroles they were being served in and putting them in a pan to finish cooking them. But are you going to put them back in the oven? That’s the best part of a gratin, the potatoes are all baked together and crispy on top. She also has no idea how long it will take, and Christina can’t resist needling her in confessional about how this gratin was all Tiffany’s idea. She tells Kimmie she has no idea, what do you want her to say, shrugging. Andi comes over, and Tiffany quickly says she’s sorry, because teacher has seen her being a brat. Andi rockets to the top of my list of sous chefs on this show, right under Scott, because the first words out of her mouth are “You’re not sorry.” Love it. Andi calls her sloppy, calls her on her attitude enough times that Tiffany finally says “OK, I’m not sorry” and then KICKS HER OUT. OK, she sends her to take a break, which means she can come back, but it was so great. Now Tiffany’s crying about how everyone made fun of her and made her look like an idiot. Did it to yourself. Dana has been put in charge of the potatoes, but she can’t get them to cook. The men are on the last table, somehow, but Brian tells Ramsey the sea bass wasn’t right so he’s recooking it. Somehow this pisses Ramsey off and then he spies Clemenza eating so now they’re all getting yelled at. So the men’s team gets kicked out. Aww, so close.
When they get back to the dorms, Justin and Clemenza immediately start yelling at each other about Clemenza not knowing how many fish were up or whatever. Scott and Ramsey finish the last table, and the women finally get done. They realize the men have been kicked out, and Tiffany says so, as she’s finally returned. Dana points out that they know that even if they’ve lost, so did the men.
Ramsey produces the comment cards. But he tears them up, because he can’t get over the fact that the teams came up with their own menus and still couldn’t get it done. There is no winning team. Everyone come up with two people.
Justin quickly puts up Robyn, and Brian follows. Robyn of course puts up Justin, because she thinks he told her the wrong thing about his dish and screwed her. Also she asked for help and he said he was too busy, mainly because he didn’t think she should need any help. Any points Robyn might have gotten from me fly out the window because she is complaining to Justin that the squash blossoms were all different sizes. As if that’s his fault. Clemenza doesn’t like Robyn, but he also doesn’t like Justin. He votes for Robyn. Dana votes for Tiffany, who says she was “set up”. What? Everyone is voting for Tiffany. Dana and Kimmie want to also vote for Barbie, for taking so long in prep. Kimmie pauses in her litany of things she hates about Barbie, so Barbie steps in to defend herself, and Kimmie gets bitchy about being interrupted. Whatever. I will note though, Barbie says she prepped the lobster that screwed Dana. Dana calls Barbie on making faces at everyone and having attitude, and Barbie makes faces in confessional. Tiffany doesn’t want to vote at first, but then she votes for Kimmie and Barbie. Christina has to pick between Barbie and Kimmie for her second vote, and it seems to be a choice for her between Kimmie’s constant questioning of things and Barbie’s attitude. The other team is at a standstill because they can’t agree on the second vote. Everyone voted for Robyn, but they seem to be tied between Brian and Clemenza.
The men’s team puts up Robyn. She smirks and tells Ramsey Justin wouldn’t help her. Oh, Robyn, you are digging your own grave. Justin says he doesn’t want to deal with her, and he’s embarrassed she’s still talking. Brian then says Clemenza is up because of the fish and that he “got his ass handed to him during prep”. Huh? Oh, because he went to clean his jacket. Still. The women put up Tiffany for failed potatoes and Barbie for slow prep. Barbie MAKES A FACE. Seriously, you’ve been told everyone knows you have an attitude because you make faces all the time, and then in response you make bitchy faces. Ramsey does not change the nominees. Tiffany says she’s a team player and she loves working with these women, and she starts crying, and she wants to stay. She swears she has passion, but Ramsey says she’s not standing out. Barbie swears she has been a team player (everyone behind her laughs) but then she says the only person that matters to her is Ramsey. Clemenza swears he didn’t lie, he just didn’t understand Ramsey. He doesn’t think he had that many problems. Ramsey knows Robyn isn’t a team player, because she’s nominated again. She’s trying valiantly to save herself, but Ramsey points out he doesn’t have another team to put her on. Robyn swears that tomorrow is a new day and she’ll be fine tomorrow, but I doubt it. Justin shakes his head. Tiffany is eliminated. She is not a leader. She wishes she could have made it further. Clemenza! Back in line! Everyone back in line! Kimmie is crying. Ramsey warns them that he can’t wait any longer for them, and if they don’t fix it, he’ll have to start getting rid of them more quickly. And since the season finale seems to be in two weeks, he’s going to have to. Kimmie promises to fight for Tiffany, and Justin is tired of Robyn. Barbie says she’ll be around more, which sucks.
Next time: southern food and gospel music. Kimmie fails, after all her big talk about all her comfort food, which is somehow not surprising. Brian makes smart ass comments. Also it looks like he gets kicked out in the middle of service.
Monday, July 16, 2012
Hell's Kitchen 7/16/12--"9 Chefs Compete" summary
Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: there was another “make a dish out of random ingredients” challenge. The men (and Robyn) won, which was nice to see. Everyone on the women’s team blamed Dana, but then nothing happened with that except Kimmie cried AGAIN and then made a bunch of empty threats about how she was going to kick Dana’s ass. AGAIN. David Beckham also showed up but nothing came of that because he was super nice about everything. The men fail, the women save them and their tickets, everyone thinks they were fine. It’s like I’m watching the same episode over and over, except this time, no one said anything about Robyn. In fact, she seems to be getting some respect. Royce finally went home, and Clemenza almost did, but I think he’s probably on his last chance. But no more Royce, which is pretty great. (click for more)
Ramsey makes a crack about how huge Clemenza’s jacket is, and Kimmie giggles as if she’s not also a large person. Robyn asks Clemenza to do her a favor and lead the team? Huh? Why doesn’t she want to do it herself? She “explains” she wants someone in her corner so she won’t go home. So she’s trying to flatter him? I think she says “seduce me” and then fake porn music plays. She knows Justin and Brian have a “bromance”, but Clemenza remembers all. Or so he claims. The women fill in part of the elimination that I don’t remember, namely that Robyn said she’d send Clemenza home. Christina is still irritated with Robyn. Tiffany is trying to “bury the hatchet” with Brian, since she kicked him off his station (at Ramsey’s orders) and he wasn’t happy. He tells her it’s because she treated him like he was crap, and she has a stupid look on her face about it. I guess she’s trying to convey how lame his argument is, but she just looks like an idiot. Tiffany interviews that he needs to get over it and it’s about “the customer”. Like suddenly she’s so concerned with customers after spending the last four or five services not caring about what she sent out. Justin jumps in and they edit it like Tiffany was speechless.
Ramsey says they are going to have some fun today. Uh oh. He says it’s weird eating competition time. Tiffany and Barbie from the women, and Brian and Justin from the men. Brian claims to have “a mighty mouth” which, not touching that one. More interesting is the fact that Ramsey asked for volunteers, and Tiffany and Justin did NOT volunteer. Justin’s not happy. There’s a big plate of wings in front of everyone. Ramsey has a plate too, which is funny because he’s totally not eating wings. He stops them right away, and says they’re dumb for thinking he’s participating, and then they bring in Joey Chestnut. A surprisingly skinny man. I wish they had gotten the Japanese guy. Dana says if Tiffany can eat as fast as she drink beers, they’ll win. Heh. 60 wings per team (I guess 60 just for Joey Chestnut). Winners get $500.
Wait, the counter looks like there are 60 wings for all four chefs to eat. And 60 for Joey. Tiffany looks sick. Joey wins, though, when the chefs still have 7 wings left. Now they have to get back in line, which is not great. Now it’s time for the blind taste test! After four of you just shoved hot wings in your mouths! Ha. The women have to sit someone out, and Kimmie immediately says she smoked this morning so she wants to sit out. What? First of all, as Dana quickly points out, everyone smoked this morning. Second, sit out Tiffany or Barbie! They can’t taste anything anyway. Kimmie’s really turning out to be all talk.
Brian claims to have trained for this, but not after eating wings. No one has gotten a perfect score, in all seasons of this show. Christina vs. Brian. Both of them get beets, they both say onion instead of shallots, Christina misses turkey (Tofu? What?), both get pineapple. So the guys are up 3 to 2. Barbie vs. Robyn. First up is grits. Robyn says rice, while Barbie says cauliflower. Sigh. All of a sudden Kimmie is scornful and says she shouldn’t have sat out. Well DUH. Terribly easy to talk a big game from the sidelines, isn’t it. They both also miss turnips and sea bass. Sadly Robyn misidentifies cilantro as tarragon. Dana mocks her. Tie score. Clemenza vs. Tiffany. They both think the lamb is chicken. Clemenza has no words. Sweet potato. Clemenza says mango. What? At least Tiffany says carrot. Eggplant is so confusing apparently that neither of them even wants to guess. Tiffany finally identifies walnuts so the women are up by one point. Dana vs. Justin. Scallops up first. Dana thinks it’s tofu. Justin nails it. Both get fig, both get radish. The last thing is a sunchoke, which is pretty hard, I think, but it’s on the menu as far as I know. Dana misses it, but Justin is the first contestant ever to get a perfect score and the men win. Dana wonders if he cheated. Winners get to go to a waterpark, which has been shut down just for them. Women have to fetch deliveries and restock the kitchens.
The whole truck is full of identical boxes of…something. Kimmie (and whoever) have carefully stacked boxes to block the exit, except they left space for people to squeeze through so, great job. The men and Robyn have a great time. Women are unloading ice. They don’t seem to be making a big deal about checking the deliveries so I guess that’s not a deal this time. Tiffany drops a bag of ice on the floor. Barbie is stacking ice at the back end of the truck, which means taking the bags off the pallets and moving them the length of the truck. It makes sense to have someone doing that, because otherwise you have to climb in and out of the truck all the time. Kimmie declares Barbie is shirking, as she stands in the entryway hollering at her. Then she says she’s “had it” and goes out to bitch at her and kick her out of the truck. They continue to yell at each other and try to compare how much they’ve been working. Barbie gets in the line that Kimmie hasn’t worked a day in her life and her ass shows it. Ooo. That’s pretty dirty. It’s also not necessarily true, but I am not as pissed as I would be if I liked Kimmie. Kimmie responds by shouting “Lazy bitch!” and applauding Barbie for walking up stairs. See, that’s why I’m not pissed at all. Christina tells them both to shut up. Brian insists he wants to be scared shitless, and decides to go on the giant slide. Clemenza refuses to join him. He manages to splash everyone when he lands, but Brian thinks it was the greatest thing ever. Women have to grind peppercorns, with a mortar and pestle. Really? You expect me to believe that not only are they doing that ahead of time, but by hand? They also have to drain and refill the fryers and peel potatoes. The men return with no trash talk.
As the women relax and hang out, there’s another delivery. Hilariously, it’s in a van that says “Midnight Delivery” on the side. There’s just one box, which says to open immediately. It ends up being an iPad with a video from Ramsey, telling them they’re coming up with the menu for tomorrow: three appetizers, three entrees, and three desserts. Red team vs. Blue team. The women want to make beet salad with frisee, and flatbread, and whatever Kimmie suggests gets shot down. She just sits there looking irritated, but not saying anything. Finally she tells them they’ve been shooting down all her ideas, but then no one reacts to that. Robyn also has a ton of ideas but Justin keeps telling her they’re not good and he says she has no fine dining experience. Brian just agrees with whatever Justin says. He says ring molds are 1980s, as he wants to stuff squash blossoms with scallops or whatever. Clemenza has noticed the Justin/Brian duo. Kimmie offers to do a BBQ sauce on rib eye, and Dana is horrified she would put sauce on a steak. Tiffany says what if she puts red wine in her sauce, and Kimmie insists that she does already. They all look at her funny and say they thought her sauce was “Asianish”. Was it? I’ve forgotten already. Dana thinks Kimmie’s taking it personally, except that they haven’t shown anyone else getting shot down. The other women insist on not calling it barbeque sauce, which I guess is lowbrow. Kimmie can’t just be glad with what victory she has. Justin knows his team has to execute properly.
Kimmie makes a big deal about asking a ton of questions, and I can’t tell if she really has no idea what’s going on (as Barbie claims) or if she’s trying to cover her ass in case the dishes suck. She asks Tiffany to taste her sauce, and she and Christina don’t like it. Finally it passes approval. Clemenza manages to spill something on himself, after Ramsey told him to stay clean for one service. Heh. Wait a minute. There’s only ten minutes left of this episode and dinner service hasn’t started. But tomorrow’s episode description doesn’t say “Part 2”. Clemenza feels he has to go back to the dorms and clean his jacket. Barbie is scrubbing mussels with a brush, which she has been doing for two hours according to Tiffany. Everyone talks about her without saying anything to her as far as I can tell. Kimmie says she’s not going to hit her, as if Kimmie has ever hit anyone in the history of ever. Barbie says she doesn’t care. Christina is pissed too. Barbie is just concerned that Ramsey sees her as a chef. Then she walks out to take a smoke break. Seriously? Christina takes over. Clemenza was gone for 45 minutes cleaning himself. Tiffany’s potatoes aren’t done, and she tries to tell Dana they’ll taste fine when they’re cool, and it’s not a big deal. Oh, like that’s going to work.
Ramsey comes out to test the dishes. The women are up first. He hates the mussels, or at least how they look, the beet and frisee salad tastes of dirt, flatbread and halibut are good, Kimmie’s sauce is delicious. The women quickly adjust. Men’s turn. Robyn’s ring mold is indeed declared 1980s. Not good. Carpaccio has no seasoning (Ramsey says there’s no seasoning anywhere), no fried onion garnishes, the quail is overcooked and there are big chunks of bone somehow. I guess Clemenza didn’t get all the bones out. All of a sudden Brian and Robyn are interviewing their goodbyes to Clemenza, and Ramsey is asking if he wants to go home.
Next time: Clemenza is indeed kicked out (and the title of the episode is “8 Chefs Compete” so I guess he’s really gone), Robyn screws up and vows revenge on Justin, her sabotage fails. It also looks like Tiffany screws up royally.
Ramsey makes a crack about how huge Clemenza’s jacket is, and Kimmie giggles as if she’s not also a large person. Robyn asks Clemenza to do her a favor and lead the team? Huh? Why doesn’t she want to do it herself? She “explains” she wants someone in her corner so she won’t go home. So she’s trying to flatter him? I think she says “seduce me” and then fake porn music plays. She knows Justin and Brian have a “bromance”, but Clemenza remembers all. Or so he claims. The women fill in part of the elimination that I don’t remember, namely that Robyn said she’d send Clemenza home. Christina is still irritated with Robyn. Tiffany is trying to “bury the hatchet” with Brian, since she kicked him off his station (at Ramsey’s orders) and he wasn’t happy. He tells her it’s because she treated him like he was crap, and she has a stupid look on her face about it. I guess she’s trying to convey how lame his argument is, but she just looks like an idiot. Tiffany interviews that he needs to get over it and it’s about “the customer”. Like suddenly she’s so concerned with customers after spending the last four or five services not caring about what she sent out. Justin jumps in and they edit it like Tiffany was speechless.
Ramsey says they are going to have some fun today. Uh oh. He says it’s weird eating competition time. Tiffany and Barbie from the women, and Brian and Justin from the men. Brian claims to have “a mighty mouth” which, not touching that one. More interesting is the fact that Ramsey asked for volunteers, and Tiffany and Justin did NOT volunteer. Justin’s not happy. There’s a big plate of wings in front of everyone. Ramsey has a plate too, which is funny because he’s totally not eating wings. He stops them right away, and says they’re dumb for thinking he’s participating, and then they bring in Joey Chestnut. A surprisingly skinny man. I wish they had gotten the Japanese guy. Dana says if Tiffany can eat as fast as she drink beers, they’ll win. Heh. 60 wings per team (I guess 60 just for Joey Chestnut). Winners get $500.
Wait, the counter looks like there are 60 wings for all four chefs to eat. And 60 for Joey. Tiffany looks sick. Joey wins, though, when the chefs still have 7 wings left. Now they have to get back in line, which is not great. Now it’s time for the blind taste test! After four of you just shoved hot wings in your mouths! Ha. The women have to sit someone out, and Kimmie immediately says she smoked this morning so she wants to sit out. What? First of all, as Dana quickly points out, everyone smoked this morning. Second, sit out Tiffany or Barbie! They can’t taste anything anyway. Kimmie’s really turning out to be all talk.
Brian claims to have trained for this, but not after eating wings. No one has gotten a perfect score, in all seasons of this show. Christina vs. Brian. Both of them get beets, they both say onion instead of shallots, Christina misses turkey (Tofu? What?), both get pineapple. So the guys are up 3 to 2. Barbie vs. Robyn. First up is grits. Robyn says rice, while Barbie says cauliflower. Sigh. All of a sudden Kimmie is scornful and says she shouldn’t have sat out. Well DUH. Terribly easy to talk a big game from the sidelines, isn’t it. They both also miss turnips and sea bass. Sadly Robyn misidentifies cilantro as tarragon. Dana mocks her. Tie score. Clemenza vs. Tiffany. They both think the lamb is chicken. Clemenza has no words. Sweet potato. Clemenza says mango. What? At least Tiffany says carrot. Eggplant is so confusing apparently that neither of them even wants to guess. Tiffany finally identifies walnuts so the women are up by one point. Dana vs. Justin. Scallops up first. Dana thinks it’s tofu. Justin nails it. Both get fig, both get radish. The last thing is a sunchoke, which is pretty hard, I think, but it’s on the menu as far as I know. Dana misses it, but Justin is the first contestant ever to get a perfect score and the men win. Dana wonders if he cheated. Winners get to go to a waterpark, which has been shut down just for them. Women have to fetch deliveries and restock the kitchens.
The whole truck is full of identical boxes of…something. Kimmie (and whoever) have carefully stacked boxes to block the exit, except they left space for people to squeeze through so, great job. The men and Robyn have a great time. Women are unloading ice. They don’t seem to be making a big deal about checking the deliveries so I guess that’s not a deal this time. Tiffany drops a bag of ice on the floor. Barbie is stacking ice at the back end of the truck, which means taking the bags off the pallets and moving them the length of the truck. It makes sense to have someone doing that, because otherwise you have to climb in and out of the truck all the time. Kimmie declares Barbie is shirking, as she stands in the entryway hollering at her. Then she says she’s “had it” and goes out to bitch at her and kick her out of the truck. They continue to yell at each other and try to compare how much they’ve been working. Barbie gets in the line that Kimmie hasn’t worked a day in her life and her ass shows it. Ooo. That’s pretty dirty. It’s also not necessarily true, but I am not as pissed as I would be if I liked Kimmie. Kimmie responds by shouting “Lazy bitch!” and applauding Barbie for walking up stairs. See, that’s why I’m not pissed at all. Christina tells them both to shut up. Brian insists he wants to be scared shitless, and decides to go on the giant slide. Clemenza refuses to join him. He manages to splash everyone when he lands, but Brian thinks it was the greatest thing ever. Women have to grind peppercorns, with a mortar and pestle. Really? You expect me to believe that not only are they doing that ahead of time, but by hand? They also have to drain and refill the fryers and peel potatoes. The men return with no trash talk.
As the women relax and hang out, there’s another delivery. Hilariously, it’s in a van that says “Midnight Delivery” on the side. There’s just one box, which says to open immediately. It ends up being an iPad with a video from Ramsey, telling them they’re coming up with the menu for tomorrow: three appetizers, three entrees, and three desserts. Red team vs. Blue team. The women want to make beet salad with frisee, and flatbread, and whatever Kimmie suggests gets shot down. She just sits there looking irritated, but not saying anything. Finally she tells them they’ve been shooting down all her ideas, but then no one reacts to that. Robyn also has a ton of ideas but Justin keeps telling her they’re not good and he says she has no fine dining experience. Brian just agrees with whatever Justin says. He says ring molds are 1980s, as he wants to stuff squash blossoms with scallops or whatever. Clemenza has noticed the Justin/Brian duo. Kimmie offers to do a BBQ sauce on rib eye, and Dana is horrified she would put sauce on a steak. Tiffany says what if she puts red wine in her sauce, and Kimmie insists that she does already. They all look at her funny and say they thought her sauce was “Asianish”. Was it? I’ve forgotten already. Dana thinks Kimmie’s taking it personally, except that they haven’t shown anyone else getting shot down. The other women insist on not calling it barbeque sauce, which I guess is lowbrow. Kimmie can’t just be glad with what victory she has. Justin knows his team has to execute properly.
Kimmie makes a big deal about asking a ton of questions, and I can’t tell if she really has no idea what’s going on (as Barbie claims) or if she’s trying to cover her ass in case the dishes suck. She asks Tiffany to taste her sauce, and she and Christina don’t like it. Finally it passes approval. Clemenza manages to spill something on himself, after Ramsey told him to stay clean for one service. Heh. Wait a minute. There’s only ten minutes left of this episode and dinner service hasn’t started. But tomorrow’s episode description doesn’t say “Part 2”. Clemenza feels he has to go back to the dorms and clean his jacket. Barbie is scrubbing mussels with a brush, which she has been doing for two hours according to Tiffany. Everyone talks about her without saying anything to her as far as I can tell. Kimmie says she’s not going to hit her, as if Kimmie has ever hit anyone in the history of ever. Barbie says she doesn’t care. Christina is pissed too. Barbie is just concerned that Ramsey sees her as a chef. Then she walks out to take a smoke break. Seriously? Christina takes over. Clemenza was gone for 45 minutes cleaning himself. Tiffany’s potatoes aren’t done, and she tries to tell Dana they’ll taste fine when they’re cool, and it’s not a big deal. Oh, like that’s going to work.
Ramsey comes out to test the dishes. The women are up first. He hates the mussels, or at least how they look, the beet and frisee salad tastes of dirt, flatbread and halibut are good, Kimmie’s sauce is delicious. The women quickly adjust. Men’s turn. Robyn’s ring mold is indeed declared 1980s. Not good. Carpaccio has no seasoning (Ramsey says there’s no seasoning anywhere), no fried onion garnishes, the quail is overcooked and there are big chunks of bone somehow. I guess Clemenza didn’t get all the bones out. All of a sudden Brian and Robyn are interviewing their goodbyes to Clemenza, and Ramsey is asking if he wants to go home.
Next time: Clemenza is indeed kicked out (and the title of the episode is “8 Chefs Compete” so I guess he’s really gone), Robyn screws up and vows revenge on Justin, her sabotage fails. It also looks like Tiffany screws up royally.
Monday, July 9, 2012
Hell's Kitchen 7/9/12--"10 Chefs Compete" summary
Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: nothing happened with Kimmie and her burns, but she went back to the kitchen and made Robyn look stupid as much as possible. I know Robyn isn’t the best chef by any stretch, but Kimmie looked mighty suspicious. Patrick and Royce both failed, and the entire women’s team also got kicked out. Robyn and Kimmie never actually came to blows, and the fight seems to be about how Robyn thought Kimmie, her “friend”, should not call her a bitch. Yeah. Anyway, Patrick was finally sent home, and Robyn was sent to the men’s team, with the promise from Ramsey that if she continues to complain, he’ll know it’s not the women but her. (click for more)
Also Tiffany and Barbie sort of got into it. Since Robyn’s gone from the team, that’s the biggest conflict now so I’m sure they’ll get into it today.
Even Christina’s happy to be rid of Robyn, as she tells Tiffany they have to get over all their arguments. That’s pretty telling, seeing as how Christina and Robyn never really got into it. Robyn promises the men that’s where she wants to be, as she tells us in confessional that men don’t have “periods” and “catty bullshit”. Oh, Robyn. You didn’t need to go there. Justin says she seems to want to be there, but they won’t tolerate any arguing and nonsense. She promises more, but they cut it like none of the men believe her.
Ramsey greets them the next morning with a craps table. WE ALREADY HAD THIS CHALLENGE. Seriously, what is with all the “get random ingredients and cook something” challenges? Is that a thing now? Is that the new trend, making shit up on the fly? Unless you’re going to go “Chopped” on it and throw in like, marshmallow fluff, I really don’t care. Roll the giant die, get a letter, choose ingredients starting with that letter, make a dish. You get 10 seconds to name something, and then I guess everyone has to make a dish with whatever. The men (and Robyn) end up with heirloom tomatoes, daikon, dragon fruit (good job, Robyn), edamame, and chicken. Yeah. Brian is super annoying while Robyn is standing around, but then chokes and can only come up with edamame. At least there is a sort of Asian theme going on. Tiffany gloats, but let’s see what they get. Women get chicory (not so easy, is it, Tiffany?), lamb, turnips, Brussels sprouts, and truffles. I think the women did slightly better.
30 minutes, and everyone has to work together to make one dish. The men are just standing around trying to figure out what’s going on. Barbie is shouting about everything and ignoring her lamb. I think they assigned each person one of the ingredients to work on. Barbie claims to be good. Brian wants to do a sushi roll with the dragon fruit. It’s sad, because he’s kind of cute, but his confessionals bug. Barbie tells someone not to put things on a plate? I guess she didn’t think they were good enough? Everyone plates together.
The women roasted the Brussels sprouts and the chicory. The lamb is braised well, sadly. The Brussels spouts aren’t perfect, and Barbie smirks in confessional that Dana should have worried about them more. 1. I’m pretty sure you told her not to put the other ones on the plate, and 2. God, I want to smack the smirk right off her face. PLEASE tell me she eventually goes down in flames. If she wins I’m going to be pissed. The men made a chicken roulade and rolled the daikon with the dragon fruit, which ended up being delicious, as well as the edemame puree. The chicken is slightly dry, though, because Royce sliced it too early. The men win. Well, the men plus Robyn. She’s thrilled. They get to go to Vegas for a day, to eat at Ramsey’s restaurant and hang out in a high roller suite. Ramsey blames the sprouts for the loss, so Kimmie claims to be mad and “shaking” because of Dana. Punishment is to stay up all night because there is pulled pork on the menu tomorrow. BBQ means an all-nighter. Kimmie is crying, again, and look, I don’t mean to make fun of her for crying in frustration, or in anger, because I have often done both of those things. But I also do not claim to be “street” and I don’t talk about how if we were “on the street” that I would kick someone’s ass. Ramsey asks her what the deal is, and she says nothing, and he lets it slide even though this is the second time that’s happened (her crying and him asking her about it).
Everyone is pissed, and Kimmie punches the punching bag and claims to be picturing Dana on it. See, that’s what I mean. You can’t act tough and talk about how you’d like to beat up on people when you cry all the time when you lose. Dana talks about making this a bonding experience, but Kimmie just rolls her eyes. The men fly out, and I would hate to be on a plane with them. The suite is awesome, obviously, and there’s a giant buffet and a gang of large-breasted short-skirted women. Poor Robyn. Couldn’t you get like, one Chippendale? Or maybe she would rather look at the women, I don’t know. Tiffany bonds with the pig. She seems to have lost it slightly. The men and Robyn meet Carrot Top. Carrot Top? Really? That’s…what? Really? Someone calls him “Mr. Top” which is stupid and also fits in with this prize. Everyone parties and dances poorly. OK, someone put a giant digital countdown clock in the middle of the dorms with a super loud alarm on it, so the women would know to go check the pig and baste, flip, check the coals, whatever. You have to get up and hit the giant red button on the side of the grill. It looks like a regular gas grill, not that big, but it is highly entertaining to me that there is an alarm that goes off every sixty minutes and a giant red button. Everyone is in bathrobes for some reason.
In the morning, everyone sort of makes it to the kitchen and starts prep. No one wants to greet the guys, who are stupid about it, of course. Robyn is confused because somehow the guys do everything differently from the women. Ramsey tells them they’re getting guests again: the men get some American Idol people (look, I never watch that show so I have absolutely no clue, it’s the season 9 winner and a season 10 finalist) while the women get David Beckham. Christina says she doesn’t watch soccer, but “what girl doesn’t think David Beckham isn’t smoking hot?” I don’t. I don’t, he doesn’t do it for me at all. Also, I think Posh should be here too. Right? You know she would give withering glares and disdainful comments about everything.
Becks rolls in with his son Brooklyn. Brooklyn Beckham. Sigh. Dana is thrilled to be assigned to the table. The BBQ is on a pulled pork pizza. Sorry, “flatbread”. Clemenza brings up gross scallops that are too greasy or something. Ramsey pours off some liquid off the plate. Nasty. The American Idols snicker. They’re fine the second item. Dana has to redo the pizza? I’m not sure if she was trying to move it and she smashed the thing, or if it wasn’t made right, or what. I thought the oven was in the back of the kitchen, but it appears to be right by the table. Becks says there’s no rush, which is cute. Tootling music follows. Christina says they’re failing at using the pizza peel, so I guess when they try to pick it up it gets all scrunched. Finally it works. The men are having the same problems, or at least burning things. Robyn jumps in to take flatbread out of the oven and serve it, which turns out well and somehow no one cares or objects to her doing it. Tiffany gets out the last order of scallops, so the women can move on to entrees.
Robyn is very vocal, and is impressing Brian. It sounds like she stepped in and took over, and no one cares, not even Royce. Then Royce brings up three Wellingtons, all at different temperatures. Oops. Then he says four minutes, and then eight minutes, then five. Sigh. Ramsey actually calls the entire team into the back room, so he can yell at them privately. Oh, I was wrong, Robyn isn’t getting yelled at. He tells them to get a grip. Robyn tries valiantly to cook everything by herself. The women screw up an order, and Tiffany brings up cod instead of sea bass. Barbie smugs that she should know the difference, but they never say if she confused them or if she thought the order said cod. Sadly, we find out it was the former, because when she goes to refire the order, Tiffany is cooking cod again. That’s sad. Even if you didn’t know which was which, shouldn’t you be able to think “that one is wrong, I’ll cook the other one”? Finally she gets it right. The men have returned, but Royce brings up dry pork chops, and Clemenza has brought up nasty fish. Becks likes his pork chop, and I have noticed that he’s holding his fork in his right hand all awkward. Is he trying to do the American thing? Instead of British, where you hold your fork in your left hand and your knife in your right but you don’t switch ever? It’s just weird, is all. Barbie brags that she’s doing it right. The women are two tickets away from being done, but the men haven’t served any entrees yet, and Royce has just told Ramsey ten minutes. What? Hilariously, Robyn counts down the blowup in confessional, and the editors intersperse her counting with Ramsey getting pissed. Ramsey calls them over to show them the empty counter next door, because the women are done. He brings over all the women but Dana, who he tells to “stay on dessert”, so I guess we’re still doing dessert. Robyn is embarrassed and pissed. Brian gets mad at Tiffany, as does Justin, but she feels that since they suck so bad, she can do whatever she wants and boss them around. Everyone eventually gets their food.
Ramsey tells the women they’ve won, and this was one of the best services they’ve had. Then he tells the men’s team the only person who did well was Robyn. A woman. Heh. Brian puts up Royce and Clemenza. Clemenza is immediately pissed, and curses so much I’m not sure what his actual protest is. He thinks Royce and Brian. They all seem to think Clemenza screwed up a bunch of scallops. Brian is named for the flatbreads. Royce claims he is not the weakest link and “everyone” knows it. Right. Robyn doesn’t know who to put up, and Brian tells her she has to be decisive. So she picks Brian and Royce. She also suggests they let Ramsey make the decision, which is quickly voted down. Heh.
Robyn says their nominees are Royce and Clemenza. Royce says he beats himself up for his mistakes, physically. The women laugh at him. He is always trying to do better. Ramsey doesn’t think he’ll get better fast enough. Clemenza can cook and has passion, but today he just screwed up scallops. He promises he’s not done. Ramsey commands both of them to take off their jackets. Damn. He takes Royce’s jacket, says “Give my regards to Ralph”, and kicks him out. Oo, he told Roshni to keep her head up, so Royce must really be bad. Royce claims to be better than everyone else and whatever, bye. Clemenza gets a dressing down, and then Ramsey says he’s a mess and needs a clean jacket. That was a great fakeout. Especially since Royce is gone and I imagine him standing around at the door, waiting for Clemenza to join him, and then slowly realizing he’s the only one eliminated. Ramsey tells Clemenza to stay clean for one service, at least. Clemenza thinks there won’t be another chance for him if he screws up again.
Next time: which is next week! All-Star game! There is an eating competition, secret package, everyone freaks out somehow. Tiffany and Brian fight.
Also Tiffany and Barbie sort of got into it. Since Robyn’s gone from the team, that’s the biggest conflict now so I’m sure they’ll get into it today.
Even Christina’s happy to be rid of Robyn, as she tells Tiffany they have to get over all their arguments. That’s pretty telling, seeing as how Christina and Robyn never really got into it. Robyn promises the men that’s where she wants to be, as she tells us in confessional that men don’t have “periods” and “catty bullshit”. Oh, Robyn. You didn’t need to go there. Justin says she seems to want to be there, but they won’t tolerate any arguing and nonsense. She promises more, but they cut it like none of the men believe her.
Ramsey greets them the next morning with a craps table. WE ALREADY HAD THIS CHALLENGE. Seriously, what is with all the “get random ingredients and cook something” challenges? Is that a thing now? Is that the new trend, making shit up on the fly? Unless you’re going to go “Chopped” on it and throw in like, marshmallow fluff, I really don’t care. Roll the giant die, get a letter, choose ingredients starting with that letter, make a dish. You get 10 seconds to name something, and then I guess everyone has to make a dish with whatever. The men (and Robyn) end up with heirloom tomatoes, daikon, dragon fruit (good job, Robyn), edamame, and chicken. Yeah. Brian is super annoying while Robyn is standing around, but then chokes and can only come up with edamame. At least there is a sort of Asian theme going on. Tiffany gloats, but let’s see what they get. Women get chicory (not so easy, is it, Tiffany?), lamb, turnips, Brussels sprouts, and truffles. I think the women did slightly better.
30 minutes, and everyone has to work together to make one dish. The men are just standing around trying to figure out what’s going on. Barbie is shouting about everything and ignoring her lamb. I think they assigned each person one of the ingredients to work on. Barbie claims to be good. Brian wants to do a sushi roll with the dragon fruit. It’s sad, because he’s kind of cute, but his confessionals bug. Barbie tells someone not to put things on a plate? I guess she didn’t think they were good enough? Everyone plates together.
The women roasted the Brussels sprouts and the chicory. The lamb is braised well, sadly. The Brussels spouts aren’t perfect, and Barbie smirks in confessional that Dana should have worried about them more. 1. I’m pretty sure you told her not to put the other ones on the plate, and 2. God, I want to smack the smirk right off her face. PLEASE tell me she eventually goes down in flames. If she wins I’m going to be pissed. The men made a chicken roulade and rolled the daikon with the dragon fruit, which ended up being delicious, as well as the edemame puree. The chicken is slightly dry, though, because Royce sliced it too early. The men win. Well, the men plus Robyn. She’s thrilled. They get to go to Vegas for a day, to eat at Ramsey’s restaurant and hang out in a high roller suite. Ramsey blames the sprouts for the loss, so Kimmie claims to be mad and “shaking” because of Dana. Punishment is to stay up all night because there is pulled pork on the menu tomorrow. BBQ means an all-nighter. Kimmie is crying, again, and look, I don’t mean to make fun of her for crying in frustration, or in anger, because I have often done both of those things. But I also do not claim to be “street” and I don’t talk about how if we were “on the street” that I would kick someone’s ass. Ramsey asks her what the deal is, and she says nothing, and he lets it slide even though this is the second time that’s happened (her crying and him asking her about it).
Everyone is pissed, and Kimmie punches the punching bag and claims to be picturing Dana on it. See, that’s what I mean. You can’t act tough and talk about how you’d like to beat up on people when you cry all the time when you lose. Dana talks about making this a bonding experience, but Kimmie just rolls her eyes. The men fly out, and I would hate to be on a plane with them. The suite is awesome, obviously, and there’s a giant buffet and a gang of large-breasted short-skirted women. Poor Robyn. Couldn’t you get like, one Chippendale? Or maybe she would rather look at the women, I don’t know. Tiffany bonds with the pig. She seems to have lost it slightly. The men and Robyn meet Carrot Top. Carrot Top? Really? That’s…what? Really? Someone calls him “Mr. Top” which is stupid and also fits in with this prize. Everyone parties and dances poorly. OK, someone put a giant digital countdown clock in the middle of the dorms with a super loud alarm on it, so the women would know to go check the pig and baste, flip, check the coals, whatever. You have to get up and hit the giant red button on the side of the grill. It looks like a regular gas grill, not that big, but it is highly entertaining to me that there is an alarm that goes off every sixty minutes and a giant red button. Everyone is in bathrobes for some reason.
In the morning, everyone sort of makes it to the kitchen and starts prep. No one wants to greet the guys, who are stupid about it, of course. Robyn is confused because somehow the guys do everything differently from the women. Ramsey tells them they’re getting guests again: the men get some American Idol people (look, I never watch that show so I have absolutely no clue, it’s the season 9 winner and a season 10 finalist) while the women get David Beckham. Christina says she doesn’t watch soccer, but “what girl doesn’t think David Beckham isn’t smoking hot?” I don’t. I don’t, he doesn’t do it for me at all. Also, I think Posh should be here too. Right? You know she would give withering glares and disdainful comments about everything.
Becks rolls in with his son Brooklyn. Brooklyn Beckham. Sigh. Dana is thrilled to be assigned to the table. The BBQ is on a pulled pork pizza. Sorry, “flatbread”. Clemenza brings up gross scallops that are too greasy or something. Ramsey pours off some liquid off the plate. Nasty. The American Idols snicker. They’re fine the second item. Dana has to redo the pizza? I’m not sure if she was trying to move it and she smashed the thing, or if it wasn’t made right, or what. I thought the oven was in the back of the kitchen, but it appears to be right by the table. Becks says there’s no rush, which is cute. Tootling music follows. Christina says they’re failing at using the pizza peel, so I guess when they try to pick it up it gets all scrunched. Finally it works. The men are having the same problems, or at least burning things. Robyn jumps in to take flatbread out of the oven and serve it, which turns out well and somehow no one cares or objects to her doing it. Tiffany gets out the last order of scallops, so the women can move on to entrees.
Robyn is very vocal, and is impressing Brian. It sounds like she stepped in and took over, and no one cares, not even Royce. Then Royce brings up three Wellingtons, all at different temperatures. Oops. Then he says four minutes, and then eight minutes, then five. Sigh. Ramsey actually calls the entire team into the back room, so he can yell at them privately. Oh, I was wrong, Robyn isn’t getting yelled at. He tells them to get a grip. Robyn tries valiantly to cook everything by herself. The women screw up an order, and Tiffany brings up cod instead of sea bass. Barbie smugs that she should know the difference, but they never say if she confused them or if she thought the order said cod. Sadly, we find out it was the former, because when she goes to refire the order, Tiffany is cooking cod again. That’s sad. Even if you didn’t know which was which, shouldn’t you be able to think “that one is wrong, I’ll cook the other one”? Finally she gets it right. The men have returned, but Royce brings up dry pork chops, and Clemenza has brought up nasty fish. Becks likes his pork chop, and I have noticed that he’s holding his fork in his right hand all awkward. Is he trying to do the American thing? Instead of British, where you hold your fork in your left hand and your knife in your right but you don’t switch ever? It’s just weird, is all. Barbie brags that she’s doing it right. The women are two tickets away from being done, but the men haven’t served any entrees yet, and Royce has just told Ramsey ten minutes. What? Hilariously, Robyn counts down the blowup in confessional, and the editors intersperse her counting with Ramsey getting pissed. Ramsey calls them over to show them the empty counter next door, because the women are done. He brings over all the women but Dana, who he tells to “stay on dessert”, so I guess we’re still doing dessert. Robyn is embarrassed and pissed. Brian gets mad at Tiffany, as does Justin, but she feels that since they suck so bad, she can do whatever she wants and boss them around. Everyone eventually gets their food.
Ramsey tells the women they’ve won, and this was one of the best services they’ve had. Then he tells the men’s team the only person who did well was Robyn. A woman. Heh. Brian puts up Royce and Clemenza. Clemenza is immediately pissed, and curses so much I’m not sure what his actual protest is. He thinks Royce and Brian. They all seem to think Clemenza screwed up a bunch of scallops. Brian is named for the flatbreads. Royce claims he is not the weakest link and “everyone” knows it. Right. Robyn doesn’t know who to put up, and Brian tells her she has to be decisive. So she picks Brian and Royce. She also suggests they let Ramsey make the decision, which is quickly voted down. Heh.
Robyn says their nominees are Royce and Clemenza. Royce says he beats himself up for his mistakes, physically. The women laugh at him. He is always trying to do better. Ramsey doesn’t think he’ll get better fast enough. Clemenza can cook and has passion, but today he just screwed up scallops. He promises he’s not done. Ramsey commands both of them to take off their jackets. Damn. He takes Royce’s jacket, says “Give my regards to Ralph”, and kicks him out. Oo, he told Roshni to keep her head up, so Royce must really be bad. Royce claims to be better than everyone else and whatever, bye. Clemenza gets a dressing down, and then Ramsey says he’s a mess and needs a clean jacket. That was a great fakeout. Especially since Royce is gone and I imagine him standing around at the door, waiting for Clemenza to join him, and then slowly realizing he’s the only one eliminated. Ramsey tells Clemenza to stay clean for one service, at least. Clemenza thinks there won’t be another chance for him if he screws up again.
Next time: which is next week! All-Star game! There is an eating competition, secret package, everyone freaks out somehow. Tiffany and Brian fight.
Tuesday, July 3, 2012
Hell's Kitchen 7/3/12--"11 Chefs Compete pt. 2" summary
Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: Kimmie and Robyn fight, and then Tiffany and Barbie fight, and the men win a challenge and then Kimmie burns herself. Also Royce needs to shut up. I think that’s about the gist of it. The DVR description says it all: “Personal dramas distract some contestants.” (click for more)
Will Kimmie have to quit? Will she lose her hand? Of course not. For all the sound clips of the medic saying “You’re not going back in that kitchen”, all she does is bandage her up and tell Kimmie to keep her hand dry. Boo. That was even more anti-climactic than I thought it would be. Everyone is glad to see her, except Robyn, who insists Kimmie is a crybaby. On the one hand, burns really hurt, but on the other hand, even though we were told Kimmie burnt her whole arm, she’s only got a light bandage over her hand. Not like when that one guy broke his wrist.
So apparently “Family Night” includes face painting and shooting hoops. Also a children’s menu and mini-pizzas for the kids. You know, I’m sure these people would be better cooks if you didn’t change the menu every night. Clemenza spins pizza dough and entertains the kids. He moves quickly, but Tiffany is too slow. In confessional she complains about how kids don’t understand fine dining, as if that has bearing on her speed in making cheese pizza. Then she burns the edges. Cutting the edges off will not magically make the bottom not burnt. As they get yelled at, Robyn is futzing around with the pizza peel in the oven. I don’t know what she’s doing that requires her to jam the thing back and forth so violently, but anyway, Tiffany gets hit in the back of the head. I don’t particularly like Robyn, but it was mildly amusing. Barbie reminds us that Tiffany doesn’t care about anything, and takes over her station. Tiffany strangely doesn’t kick her off, she just goes to the stove and complains. I do agree, Barbie does have a really obnoxious smirk. Brian has lost it and calls himself “Super Horse”…in Spanish. Now he’s just babbling. No one is as entertained as I am. His blinis (stop calling them “bellinis“, dumbass) are burnt. Ramsey shouts at him to imitate a fucking chef for once. Hee. Tiffany has also jacked up the blinis, and literally says “Who cares?” to Dana. I agree with Barbie, that Tiffany should probably care, but it’s not like Barbie is so great or is the mentor somehow. Also thank God Ramsey says “blinis”. Barbie jumps in again, and Tiffany is pissed, but that’s twice you sent up burned food and she did it properly. The men get their act together.
Patrick is now on meat, and he says he is ready to go, bringing drive, whatever. So you know the first steak up is terrible. Kimmie doesn’t listen to Robyn and Christina confirm the order, so she asks Robyn again, causing Robyn to snap in frustration, and then Kimmie to get on her high horse and say Robyn doesn’t need to scream at her. Then listen to them. Apparently this is “Robyn acting crazy”. Robyn is mildly annoying, but she and Kimmie have no communication at all and it’s hard to tell what is going on. Probably they’re both at fault. The steaks are not right, and Robyn brags in confessional that now Kimmie will be yelled at and this will be great. Of course the problem is what Robyn sliced. Patrick recovers on his second try, because he is “a special chef”. Royce appears to get yelled at for not repeating the order? I don’t know. Patrick repeats the order wrong, and curses a lot. Ramsey tells him to get “some fresh air”, which I think means he’s allowed back in at some point. A small child points and laughs. Hee. I was right, he is allowed back in. The women are also back on track, sort of. Robyn says her fish is ready, and someone clearly says “Yeah, go”. So she goes up there and Christina yells back that it would have been nice to tell her that a minute ago, because she’s not ready. Kimmie agrees that she also needs a minute. Upon rewind? Kimmie clearly is the one telling her to go. Her excuse? “You have to talk to Christina too.” See, that would work if you weren’t making such a big deal about how you also need a minute and will be ready WITH Christina. In the end, Kimmie didn’t need to sabotage anyone because Robyn cooked the fish seven minutes ago. So it would have been terrible either way. Patrick has to recook a filet because it’s raw, but it doesn’t cook fast enough and he brings it up anyway. Duh. Ramsey kicks him out for good this time. He’s pretty upset about it.
Justin has picked up the slack and is doing well. Robyn and Kimmie are still arguing about their times and even Ramsey doesn’t know what is going on. Kimmie is claiming her times don’t include slicing? Or something? Anyway, Robyn says “Fine, I’m wrong then” and Kimmie says “Yes you are” which is just bitchy. That is what you say when you are just trying to rub it in and piss off the other person. They figure it out, somehow. Royce is still babbling about what a great cook he is, which means that he’s brought up raw steak and is kicked out. He feels that he only screwed up one table and should have another chance. You’re not counting all the other chances in all the other services. Kimmie’s still making comments, and she doesn’t realize that when Robyn says “Let me know so we can walk together” you can’t just bitch “Stop talking to me”. I wonder if Kimmie is throwing the challenge so she can try and get Robyn eliminated. Now Barbie and Tiffany are shouting about times too. Ramsey calls the men over to take over, and the girls try to fight them off and tell them they don’t need help. Robyn is telling Barbie the time thing is all Kimmie’s fault, more cursing, hilariously one of the men reminds them there are kids in the dining room. As if they haven’t been cursing all day. Heh. Kimmie and Robyn can’t say anything without snide comments. Cold steak again. Ramsey kicks all of the women out.
In the dorms, Robyn yells about how it’s not her fault and her fish was fine and she’s forgotten the one she cooked seven minutes early, I guess. Christina leaves the room because she’s tired of Robyn, which makes her the smart one. Although, when Kimmie runs into her on the stairs, Christina says Kimmie needs to get up there because Robyn is throwing her under the bus. Instigator. The yelling begins, which is heavily bleeped so who knows what they’re actually saying. Christina hears them and decides she should probably be in the room. Robyn argues that since it WAS Kimmie’s fault, then saying so is not “throwing Kimmie under the bus”. I don’t think I agree, but at least she’s got some vague logic going on. Kimmie never had food sent back. Dana is seriously laughing. Now it is about Kimmie calling Robyn a bitch when supposedly they were friends. The rest of the women make hilarious faces. Also where are Patrick and Royce? Christina just wishes they would both shut up. Justin, Brian, and Clemenza finish all the tables.
Ramsey starts out his after-dinner dressing down with “Holy crap.” No winners tonight, because “there is more passion in the valet parking.” Heh. Two nominees, you know the drill. Brian thinks the men should have won, which I would agree with, but since two men got kicked out of the kitchen, it makes an easy decision. Royce is insane because he thinks he shouldn’t be up. Round two for the women! Christina starts off with Tiffany, because of her screaming at Barbie. Barbie says she was just trying to be clear, which of course irritates Tiffany. Obviously Kimmie is voting for Robyn, and Robyn is voting for Kimmie. You’ll note that when Kimmie explains herself, Robyn just shakes her head, while Kimmie makes a snide comment to Robyn. Now they start yelling about whether or not Kimmie screwed up and if Kimmie can’t admit when she’s wrong. All of a sudden Robyn leaps out of her seat and gets right up in Kimmie’s face. Oh, with the pointing finger too! Robyn hates being called a bitch, I guess. I don’t think either of them were going to do anything. Christina thinks every fight involves Robyn.
Of course the men put up Patrick and Royce, which Ramsey has no argument with. Kimmie says that Tiffany and Robyn are up. Interesting, Kimmie is saying they nominated Robyn because she lied to Ramsey about how long ago she cooked the fish that time. Robyn can’t even wait until she’s called forward and starts insisting that was a miscommunication and she didn’t lie because her mother raised her right. Kimmie is shocked. OK, I get that Robyn is annoying and no one likes her, and she causes conflict, but it is hard to take Kimmie’s side when she won’t shut up. Robyn completely and utterly loses it and turns to Kimmie right then and starts yelling about “getting dirty”. FINALLY Kimmie figures out she should just stand there and not say anything. Ramsey does not change the nominees. Royce has a lot of fight and something about being beaten and coming back for more and getting better. Ramsey just says, “I’m not feeling it.” Patrick is a professional and is fighting through his problems and he can do it. He begs Ramsey not to lose faith in him. Ramsey asks Tiffany if she cares, so he’s no dummy. Barbie shakes her head behind her, like, you can shut up too Barbie, you‘re not so great. Tiffany swears she’s not done, it’s just too catty on her team. Barbie has made too many faces so Ramsey gives her the chance to act superior and be disappointed in how little Tiffany cares about anything. Tiffany manages to react without cursing and tells Ramsey this is the cattiness she was talking about and really Barbie can’t run her station by herself so she should be up there. “I don’t want to hear your eye-rolling!” Ha, that is great. Tiffany says she does care. On a scale of 1-10? “I care, like a 9”. Oh, Tiffany. Robyn has not given up, she has standards but sometimes she drops them to save other people. What other people? “I feel like I protect Kimmie.” HA! This is getting better. More arguing, which includes Robyn asking to be on the men’s team, and the men looking horrified. Tiffany and Royce! Back in line! Barbie can’t keep her face still, shut up Barbie. Patrick is eliminated. Aww, he thinks his family will be disappointed. Ramsey says he’s not done, which implies that at the least, Robyn won’t be back with the women. And thankfully, we don’t have to wait until next week to find out Robyn is now on the men’s team. Clemenza doesn’t look happy. Ramsey promises her that if she complains about the men, he’ll be looking at her, and only her, for elimination. Kimmie gloats, while Clemenza says that she hates the women and maybe they can turn that to their advantage.
Next time: David Beckham, who does not do it for me at all, but whatever. The men screw up again. I think it’s Royce.
Will Kimmie have to quit? Will she lose her hand? Of course not. For all the sound clips of the medic saying “You’re not going back in that kitchen”, all she does is bandage her up and tell Kimmie to keep her hand dry. Boo. That was even more anti-climactic than I thought it would be. Everyone is glad to see her, except Robyn, who insists Kimmie is a crybaby. On the one hand, burns really hurt, but on the other hand, even though we were told Kimmie burnt her whole arm, she’s only got a light bandage over her hand. Not like when that one guy broke his wrist.
So apparently “Family Night” includes face painting and shooting hoops. Also a children’s menu and mini-pizzas for the kids. You know, I’m sure these people would be better cooks if you didn’t change the menu every night. Clemenza spins pizza dough and entertains the kids. He moves quickly, but Tiffany is too slow. In confessional she complains about how kids don’t understand fine dining, as if that has bearing on her speed in making cheese pizza. Then she burns the edges. Cutting the edges off will not magically make the bottom not burnt. As they get yelled at, Robyn is futzing around with the pizza peel in the oven. I don’t know what she’s doing that requires her to jam the thing back and forth so violently, but anyway, Tiffany gets hit in the back of the head. I don’t particularly like Robyn, but it was mildly amusing. Barbie reminds us that Tiffany doesn’t care about anything, and takes over her station. Tiffany strangely doesn’t kick her off, she just goes to the stove and complains. I do agree, Barbie does have a really obnoxious smirk. Brian has lost it and calls himself “Super Horse”…in Spanish. Now he’s just babbling. No one is as entertained as I am. His blinis (stop calling them “bellinis“, dumbass) are burnt. Ramsey shouts at him to imitate a fucking chef for once. Hee. Tiffany has also jacked up the blinis, and literally says “Who cares?” to Dana. I agree with Barbie, that Tiffany should probably care, but it’s not like Barbie is so great or is the mentor somehow. Also thank God Ramsey says “blinis”. Barbie jumps in again, and Tiffany is pissed, but that’s twice you sent up burned food and she did it properly. The men get their act together.
Patrick is now on meat, and he says he is ready to go, bringing drive, whatever. So you know the first steak up is terrible. Kimmie doesn’t listen to Robyn and Christina confirm the order, so she asks Robyn again, causing Robyn to snap in frustration, and then Kimmie to get on her high horse and say Robyn doesn’t need to scream at her. Then listen to them. Apparently this is “Robyn acting crazy”. Robyn is mildly annoying, but she and Kimmie have no communication at all and it’s hard to tell what is going on. Probably they’re both at fault. The steaks are not right, and Robyn brags in confessional that now Kimmie will be yelled at and this will be great. Of course the problem is what Robyn sliced. Patrick recovers on his second try, because he is “a special chef”. Royce appears to get yelled at for not repeating the order? I don’t know. Patrick repeats the order wrong, and curses a lot. Ramsey tells him to get “some fresh air”, which I think means he’s allowed back in at some point. A small child points and laughs. Hee. I was right, he is allowed back in. The women are also back on track, sort of. Robyn says her fish is ready, and someone clearly says “Yeah, go”. So she goes up there and Christina yells back that it would have been nice to tell her that a minute ago, because she’s not ready. Kimmie agrees that she also needs a minute. Upon rewind? Kimmie clearly is the one telling her to go. Her excuse? “You have to talk to Christina too.” See, that would work if you weren’t making such a big deal about how you also need a minute and will be ready WITH Christina. In the end, Kimmie didn’t need to sabotage anyone because Robyn cooked the fish seven minutes ago. So it would have been terrible either way. Patrick has to recook a filet because it’s raw, but it doesn’t cook fast enough and he brings it up anyway. Duh. Ramsey kicks him out for good this time. He’s pretty upset about it.
Justin has picked up the slack and is doing well. Robyn and Kimmie are still arguing about their times and even Ramsey doesn’t know what is going on. Kimmie is claiming her times don’t include slicing? Or something? Anyway, Robyn says “Fine, I’m wrong then” and Kimmie says “Yes you are” which is just bitchy. That is what you say when you are just trying to rub it in and piss off the other person. They figure it out, somehow. Royce is still babbling about what a great cook he is, which means that he’s brought up raw steak and is kicked out. He feels that he only screwed up one table and should have another chance. You’re not counting all the other chances in all the other services. Kimmie’s still making comments, and she doesn’t realize that when Robyn says “Let me know so we can walk together” you can’t just bitch “Stop talking to me”. I wonder if Kimmie is throwing the challenge so she can try and get Robyn eliminated. Now Barbie and Tiffany are shouting about times too. Ramsey calls the men over to take over, and the girls try to fight them off and tell them they don’t need help. Robyn is telling Barbie the time thing is all Kimmie’s fault, more cursing, hilariously one of the men reminds them there are kids in the dining room. As if they haven’t been cursing all day. Heh. Kimmie and Robyn can’t say anything without snide comments. Cold steak again. Ramsey kicks all of the women out.
In the dorms, Robyn yells about how it’s not her fault and her fish was fine and she’s forgotten the one she cooked seven minutes early, I guess. Christina leaves the room because she’s tired of Robyn, which makes her the smart one. Although, when Kimmie runs into her on the stairs, Christina says Kimmie needs to get up there because Robyn is throwing her under the bus. Instigator. The yelling begins, which is heavily bleeped so who knows what they’re actually saying. Christina hears them and decides she should probably be in the room. Robyn argues that since it WAS Kimmie’s fault, then saying so is not “throwing Kimmie under the bus”. I don’t think I agree, but at least she’s got some vague logic going on. Kimmie never had food sent back. Dana is seriously laughing. Now it is about Kimmie calling Robyn a bitch when supposedly they were friends. The rest of the women make hilarious faces. Also where are Patrick and Royce? Christina just wishes they would both shut up. Justin, Brian, and Clemenza finish all the tables.
Ramsey starts out his after-dinner dressing down with “Holy crap.” No winners tonight, because “there is more passion in the valet parking.” Heh. Two nominees, you know the drill. Brian thinks the men should have won, which I would agree with, but since two men got kicked out of the kitchen, it makes an easy decision. Royce is insane because he thinks he shouldn’t be up. Round two for the women! Christina starts off with Tiffany, because of her screaming at Barbie. Barbie says she was just trying to be clear, which of course irritates Tiffany. Obviously Kimmie is voting for Robyn, and Robyn is voting for Kimmie. You’ll note that when Kimmie explains herself, Robyn just shakes her head, while Kimmie makes a snide comment to Robyn. Now they start yelling about whether or not Kimmie screwed up and if Kimmie can’t admit when she’s wrong. All of a sudden Robyn leaps out of her seat and gets right up in Kimmie’s face. Oh, with the pointing finger too! Robyn hates being called a bitch, I guess. I don’t think either of them were going to do anything. Christina thinks every fight involves Robyn.
Of course the men put up Patrick and Royce, which Ramsey has no argument with. Kimmie says that Tiffany and Robyn are up. Interesting, Kimmie is saying they nominated Robyn because she lied to Ramsey about how long ago she cooked the fish that time. Robyn can’t even wait until she’s called forward and starts insisting that was a miscommunication and she didn’t lie because her mother raised her right. Kimmie is shocked. OK, I get that Robyn is annoying and no one likes her, and she causes conflict, but it is hard to take Kimmie’s side when she won’t shut up. Robyn completely and utterly loses it and turns to Kimmie right then and starts yelling about “getting dirty”. FINALLY Kimmie figures out she should just stand there and not say anything. Ramsey does not change the nominees. Royce has a lot of fight and something about being beaten and coming back for more and getting better. Ramsey just says, “I’m not feeling it.” Patrick is a professional and is fighting through his problems and he can do it. He begs Ramsey not to lose faith in him. Ramsey asks Tiffany if she cares, so he’s no dummy. Barbie shakes her head behind her, like, you can shut up too Barbie, you‘re not so great. Tiffany swears she’s not done, it’s just too catty on her team. Barbie has made too many faces so Ramsey gives her the chance to act superior and be disappointed in how little Tiffany cares about anything. Tiffany manages to react without cursing and tells Ramsey this is the cattiness she was talking about and really Barbie can’t run her station by herself so she should be up there. “I don’t want to hear your eye-rolling!” Ha, that is great. Tiffany says she does care. On a scale of 1-10? “I care, like a 9”. Oh, Tiffany. Robyn has not given up, she has standards but sometimes she drops them to save other people. What other people? “I feel like I protect Kimmie.” HA! This is getting better. More arguing, which includes Robyn asking to be on the men’s team, and the men looking horrified. Tiffany and Royce! Back in line! Barbie can’t keep her face still, shut up Barbie. Patrick is eliminated. Aww, he thinks his family will be disappointed. Ramsey says he’s not done, which implies that at the least, Robyn won’t be back with the women. And thankfully, we don’t have to wait until next week to find out Robyn is now on the men’s team. Clemenza doesn’t look happy. Ramsey promises her that if she complains about the men, he’ll be looking at her, and only her, for elimination. Kimmie gloats, while Clemenza says that she hates the women and maybe they can turn that to their advantage.
Next time: David Beckham, who does not do it for me at all, but whatever. The men screw up again. I think it’s Royce.
Monday, July 2, 2012
Hell's Kitchen 7/2/12--"11 Chefs Compete" summary
Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: the women went to a spa, while the men had to clean the dorms. That’s about how much drama there was with that. The women all still hate each other, but unlike the men, they are able to ignore that to finish dinner service. The men try to get rid of Clemenza and Brian, but Ramsey sees right through all of that nonsense and nominates Roshni for screwing up meat, and Patrick for generally not being a leader. Roshni tries to repeat Clemenza’s passionate defense of himself, which worked for Clemenza but does not work for Roshni, who is sent home. (click for more)
Christina gets briefly called back for some praise about her dish yesterday. Right, because we’re down to a small enough number that Ramsey is starting to praise people. Kimmie brags about how great the women are. Clemenza is still pissed off about being nominated, but in the end, he didn’t get eliminated so whatever. Patrick bitches at Royce for nominating him, and also for picking him when everyone else said Roshni should go home. Empty threats are spoken.
In the morning, apparently…Kimmie is a rapper. It lessens your effect when you have to read your words off a piece of paper. Also your rhythm is terrible.
Ramsey has a giant rectangle covered in a gold sheet. He asks them if they are feeling lucky. Hmm. Vegas-related commentary about luck. Dana says she doesn’t get it. I don’t exactly get it because haven’t we already had more than one “pick random ingredients and make something” challenge? I mean, that’s usually what this is, some spinner or craps table or whatever. Ah…a slot machine. Eh…I’ve seen it before. There will be one cut of steak, and four “complementary” ingredients. Royce yells about beef and I want to smack him. Shut up, Royce. Only five dishes will be tasted, so the women have to pick one person to not be at the slot machine. Oo, they don’t even get to cook anything? Usually they let them cook and then Ramsey tastes their dish and says it’s the best one. No one wants to sit out, because it’s steak and Ramsey is opening a steakhouse, but eventually Kimmie volunteers. She basically just gives up trying to argue and is like “fine, whatever”. Everyone spins and yells out the slot machine results. It’s not exciting except that Royce and Christina will be competing again, and she kicked his ass last time, and he says “I won’t stop ‘till she’s crying”. Nice. Also, suspiciously, no one gets the same cut of steak or even the same side ingredients. Now for the twist: Kimmie will still be cooking. She has to pick one of her teammates to go up against, so she can basically pick what she wants. She picks Robyn, which of course pisses off Robyn, and then her team will taste both dishes and pick one to go up against Clemenza.
30 minutes. Some flailing, and more fucking annoying confessional footage from Royce. He was just stupid before, but now I actively want him to fail. Kimmie is frying things, as she says that is “the Southern way”. People talk about how they are going to win. Patrick mentions seasoning everything. It’s implied Clemenza runs out of time. Yeah, it’s not very exciting. Ramsey gives the women one minute to decide if Kimmie or Robyn is going to serve. Kimmie tries to describe her dish, but the women just talk over her, asking if they can taste things. In the end they go with Robyn’s dish, which makes Kimmie cry, but she tells Ramsey she’s fine. Robyn says with disgust that she’s working with a child. Like you’re so great yourself.
Tiffany and Justin: filet, beets, carrots, zucchini, and chorizo. Justin seems to have a chorizo pancake and cream sauce, “ truffle smashed” beets, glazed carrots. Ramsey says it’s delicious. Tiffany has stuffed the filet with zucchini and chorizo. Apparently that is a waste of filet. Ramsey likes the taste, but since it’s been stuffed, it’s overcooked. One point for the men. Royce and Christina: hanger steak, eggplant, asparagus, yams, and crab. Christina marinated her steak, and then pan-fried the eggplant and wrapped it around the asparagus. But the yams are dull. Everything else is great, though. Royce made a crab cake and grilled the vegetables. Well, most of the vegetables, because the eggplant is not cooked enough. Christina wins, so ha on Royce. Dana and Patrick: flatiron steak, potatoes, mushrooms, spinach, and blue cheese. Dana’s dish looks kind of gross and has a lot of sauce. And then her steak is overcooked. Dana did some classic steakhouse sides, but Patrick made mushroom and potato hash and blue cheese cream sauce. Of course since Patrick made a big deal about seasoning, he’s oversalted everything. No points for anyone. Barbie and Brian: NY strip, celery root, tomatoes, cauliflower, and shrimp. Brian promises to “slam [his] head into the first hard, blunt object [he] can find” if he loses. Barbie’s steak is delicious and the shrimp are cooked properly. Brian talks a bunch, and his steak is great too. Barbie wins, but then so does Brian, so a point for everyone. So of course the score is tied, and the last dish is Robyn and Clemenza: rib eye, parsnip, broccoli, corn, and bacon. So I’m going to call it now: the men will win, and Ramsey will taste Kimmie’s dish and claim it would have beaten Clemenza. Clemenza’s steak is slightly undercooked, but it tastes great. In contrast, Robyn’s steak is overcooked and the rub is soggy. See? I told you.
Kimmie is crying, I guess because she’s tired of losing. Even though she hasn’t said anything to Robyn, Robyn takes it personally and says it’s not her fault because the whole team made the decision and Kimmie needs to get over it. So now of course Kimmie’s dish is brought up to be tasted, and is delicious. Robyn says she knew he would say that, but she’s still the one who needs to get over it. Robyn reluctantly admits it tastes good, but comes back with the fact that it looks terrible. Kimmie gloats in confessional. Men are going to Sur La Table, which is awesome. Also fancy lunch. Red team has to prep for “Steak Night”, which means Ramsey has ordered a whole side of beef that they’ll need to drag inside and prep.
When the beef comes, Kimmie is shocked at how big it is. Haven’t you ever seen a live cow? “Me and Clemenza could lie down next to each other and that thing would STILL be bigger!” OK, that was funny. The sound editors helpfully add in a moo. Somehow the women manage to make it inside. As the men shop, they are thrilled. That is a cool store. Christina feels this is Robyn’s fault, and she tells Kimmie (in front of everyone, of course) that Kimmie should have sold her dish more. Robyn bitches about everyone and the lack of a team, because of course she hasn’t been badmouthing everyone else all day. The men are leering at their waitress, and seriously I would refuse to serve them. I liked it when they were pretending to be gentlemen for Roshni. Robyn announces that Barbie took her knife kit, and then everyone basically tells her to shut up and stop being such a bitch. Kimmie tries to claim it’s because Robyn speaks with “aggression”, but Robyn just says no one is going to change how anyone else here speaks. I think Robyn has a point, but no one is going to take her side. She declares she is not going to talk to anyone. Robyn says everyone is giving dirty looks, and Kimmie says that means Robyn is doing it too. What? Kimmie shuts down and says she’s not in the mood, but then KEEPS TALKING about how annoyed she is. If you’re going to claim you don’t want to deal with it today, then you have to shut up. Kimmie then claims in confessional that she is done with childish games and she is letting it go.
Back in the dorms, Robyn says she is also over it and needs to sleep. Of course, Kimmie snores, and it keeps Robyn awake so she has to go sleep on the couch or whatever. I can’t imagine this is the first night Kimmie has snored that loudly. If you snore, you snore all the time. Oh, I was wrong. Robyn snuck into the other bedroom, so then when those people wake up, they freak out. Somehow that is too creepy. I agree. Robyn is super butthurt and shocked that the other girls want her to sleep on the sofa next time. Dude, you don’t sneak into a bedroom at 5am and crash out on the spare bed. Now she doesn’t trust anyone and she’s pissed. Robyn finds a sympathetic ear in Tiffany, which, how does Tiffany sleep through the snoring? Patrick prays to a picture of his kids and gets emotional.
Everyone gets ready for service, especially Justin, who seems to be taking the leadership bossy role from Patrick. Tiffany declares she doesn’t care if the onions are sliced or what, and Barbie interviews that Tiffany doesn’t care about standards. But she says it in a really obnoxious superior “I’m concerned and disappointed” teacher tone. Barbie tattles to Chef Andi and then smirks about it, because she refuses to let Tiffany bring the team down. Tiffany and Robyn complain that Barbie should have just redone the onions, which I’m sure would never have resulted in Tiffany bitching that Barbie is up in her business. Christina and Kimmie both say there is not time for this nonsense. Tiffany has to get in that Barbie can’t work on the line, and maybe she should learn before she passes judgment on Tiffany. Dana has also jumped on the “shut up during service” train with Kimmie and Christina.
Ramsey promises to be studying every detail, and also Justin’s dish is on the menu. So that’s why he’s been so bossy. Also there’s a children’s menu. Patrick and Kimmie are on meat, for Steak Night, so the pressure is on. All of a sudden Kimmie burns her hand. I’m not sure what happened, if she splashed oil on it or what, because it didn’t look like she touched the pan. The announcer confirms they’re grease burns, and the medic tells her she’s not going back into the kitchen. It’s hard to see, but you can tell that Kimmie is shaking pretty badly. The medic keeps telling her to breathe. What will happen?
Next time: supposedly we find out if Kimmie is going to quit the show, but then again, there’s a clip of her and Robyn getting in each other’s faces in the dorms. If she quit, I doubt that would have happened. Patrick gets kicked out of the kitchen. Christina is literally holding onto Kimmie. Man, we haven’t had a good fight on a reality show for a while.
Christina gets briefly called back for some praise about her dish yesterday. Right, because we’re down to a small enough number that Ramsey is starting to praise people. Kimmie brags about how great the women are. Clemenza is still pissed off about being nominated, but in the end, he didn’t get eliminated so whatever. Patrick bitches at Royce for nominating him, and also for picking him when everyone else said Roshni should go home. Empty threats are spoken.
In the morning, apparently…Kimmie is a rapper. It lessens your effect when you have to read your words off a piece of paper. Also your rhythm is terrible.
Ramsey has a giant rectangle covered in a gold sheet. He asks them if they are feeling lucky. Hmm. Vegas-related commentary about luck. Dana says she doesn’t get it. I don’t exactly get it because haven’t we already had more than one “pick random ingredients and make something” challenge? I mean, that’s usually what this is, some spinner or craps table or whatever. Ah…a slot machine. Eh…I’ve seen it before. There will be one cut of steak, and four “complementary” ingredients. Royce yells about beef and I want to smack him. Shut up, Royce. Only five dishes will be tasted, so the women have to pick one person to not be at the slot machine. Oo, they don’t even get to cook anything? Usually they let them cook and then Ramsey tastes their dish and says it’s the best one. No one wants to sit out, because it’s steak and Ramsey is opening a steakhouse, but eventually Kimmie volunteers. She basically just gives up trying to argue and is like “fine, whatever”. Everyone spins and yells out the slot machine results. It’s not exciting except that Royce and Christina will be competing again, and she kicked his ass last time, and he says “I won’t stop ‘till she’s crying”. Nice. Also, suspiciously, no one gets the same cut of steak or even the same side ingredients. Now for the twist: Kimmie will still be cooking. She has to pick one of her teammates to go up against, so she can basically pick what she wants. She picks Robyn, which of course pisses off Robyn, and then her team will taste both dishes and pick one to go up against Clemenza.
30 minutes. Some flailing, and more fucking annoying confessional footage from Royce. He was just stupid before, but now I actively want him to fail. Kimmie is frying things, as she says that is “the Southern way”. People talk about how they are going to win. Patrick mentions seasoning everything. It’s implied Clemenza runs out of time. Yeah, it’s not very exciting. Ramsey gives the women one minute to decide if Kimmie or Robyn is going to serve. Kimmie tries to describe her dish, but the women just talk over her, asking if they can taste things. In the end they go with Robyn’s dish, which makes Kimmie cry, but she tells Ramsey she’s fine. Robyn says with disgust that she’s working with a child. Like you’re so great yourself.
Tiffany and Justin: filet, beets, carrots, zucchini, and chorizo. Justin seems to have a chorizo pancake and cream sauce, “ truffle smashed” beets, glazed carrots. Ramsey says it’s delicious. Tiffany has stuffed the filet with zucchini and chorizo. Apparently that is a waste of filet. Ramsey likes the taste, but since it’s been stuffed, it’s overcooked. One point for the men. Royce and Christina: hanger steak, eggplant, asparagus, yams, and crab. Christina marinated her steak, and then pan-fried the eggplant and wrapped it around the asparagus. But the yams are dull. Everything else is great, though. Royce made a crab cake and grilled the vegetables. Well, most of the vegetables, because the eggplant is not cooked enough. Christina wins, so ha on Royce. Dana and Patrick: flatiron steak, potatoes, mushrooms, spinach, and blue cheese. Dana’s dish looks kind of gross and has a lot of sauce. And then her steak is overcooked. Dana did some classic steakhouse sides, but Patrick made mushroom and potato hash and blue cheese cream sauce. Of course since Patrick made a big deal about seasoning, he’s oversalted everything. No points for anyone. Barbie and Brian: NY strip, celery root, tomatoes, cauliflower, and shrimp. Brian promises to “slam [his] head into the first hard, blunt object [he] can find” if he loses. Barbie’s steak is delicious and the shrimp are cooked properly. Brian talks a bunch, and his steak is great too. Barbie wins, but then so does Brian, so a point for everyone. So of course the score is tied, and the last dish is Robyn and Clemenza: rib eye, parsnip, broccoli, corn, and bacon. So I’m going to call it now: the men will win, and Ramsey will taste Kimmie’s dish and claim it would have beaten Clemenza. Clemenza’s steak is slightly undercooked, but it tastes great. In contrast, Robyn’s steak is overcooked and the rub is soggy. See? I told you.
Kimmie is crying, I guess because she’s tired of losing. Even though she hasn’t said anything to Robyn, Robyn takes it personally and says it’s not her fault because the whole team made the decision and Kimmie needs to get over it. So now of course Kimmie’s dish is brought up to be tasted, and is delicious. Robyn says she knew he would say that, but she’s still the one who needs to get over it. Robyn reluctantly admits it tastes good, but comes back with the fact that it looks terrible. Kimmie gloats in confessional. Men are going to Sur La Table, which is awesome. Also fancy lunch. Red team has to prep for “Steak Night”, which means Ramsey has ordered a whole side of beef that they’ll need to drag inside and prep.
When the beef comes, Kimmie is shocked at how big it is. Haven’t you ever seen a live cow? “Me and Clemenza could lie down next to each other and that thing would STILL be bigger!” OK, that was funny. The sound editors helpfully add in a moo. Somehow the women manage to make it inside. As the men shop, they are thrilled. That is a cool store. Christina feels this is Robyn’s fault, and she tells Kimmie (in front of everyone, of course) that Kimmie should have sold her dish more. Robyn bitches about everyone and the lack of a team, because of course she hasn’t been badmouthing everyone else all day. The men are leering at their waitress, and seriously I would refuse to serve them. I liked it when they were pretending to be gentlemen for Roshni. Robyn announces that Barbie took her knife kit, and then everyone basically tells her to shut up and stop being such a bitch. Kimmie tries to claim it’s because Robyn speaks with “aggression”, but Robyn just says no one is going to change how anyone else here speaks. I think Robyn has a point, but no one is going to take her side. She declares she is not going to talk to anyone. Robyn says everyone is giving dirty looks, and Kimmie says that means Robyn is doing it too. What? Kimmie shuts down and says she’s not in the mood, but then KEEPS TALKING about how annoyed she is. If you’re going to claim you don’t want to deal with it today, then you have to shut up. Kimmie then claims in confessional that she is done with childish games and she is letting it go.
Back in the dorms, Robyn says she is also over it and needs to sleep. Of course, Kimmie snores, and it keeps Robyn awake so she has to go sleep on the couch or whatever. I can’t imagine this is the first night Kimmie has snored that loudly. If you snore, you snore all the time. Oh, I was wrong. Robyn snuck into the other bedroom, so then when those people wake up, they freak out. Somehow that is too creepy. I agree. Robyn is super butthurt and shocked that the other girls want her to sleep on the sofa next time. Dude, you don’t sneak into a bedroom at 5am and crash out on the spare bed. Now she doesn’t trust anyone and she’s pissed. Robyn finds a sympathetic ear in Tiffany, which, how does Tiffany sleep through the snoring? Patrick prays to a picture of his kids and gets emotional.
Everyone gets ready for service, especially Justin, who seems to be taking the leadership bossy role from Patrick. Tiffany declares she doesn’t care if the onions are sliced or what, and Barbie interviews that Tiffany doesn’t care about standards. But she says it in a really obnoxious superior “I’m concerned and disappointed” teacher tone. Barbie tattles to Chef Andi and then smirks about it, because she refuses to let Tiffany bring the team down. Tiffany and Robyn complain that Barbie should have just redone the onions, which I’m sure would never have resulted in Tiffany bitching that Barbie is up in her business. Christina and Kimmie both say there is not time for this nonsense. Tiffany has to get in that Barbie can’t work on the line, and maybe she should learn before she passes judgment on Tiffany. Dana has also jumped on the “shut up during service” train with Kimmie and Christina.
Ramsey promises to be studying every detail, and also Justin’s dish is on the menu. So that’s why he’s been so bossy. Also there’s a children’s menu. Patrick and Kimmie are on meat, for Steak Night, so the pressure is on. All of a sudden Kimmie burns her hand. I’m not sure what happened, if she splashed oil on it or what, because it didn’t look like she touched the pan. The announcer confirms they’re grease burns, and the medic tells her she’s not going back into the kitchen. It’s hard to see, but you can tell that Kimmie is shaking pretty badly. The medic keeps telling her to breathe. What will happen?
Next time: supposedly we find out if Kimmie is going to quit the show, but then again, there’s a clip of her and Robyn getting in each other’s faces in the dorms. If she quit, I doubt that would have happened. Patrick gets kicked out of the kitchen. Christina is literally holding onto Kimmie. Man, we haven’t had a good fight on a reality show for a while.
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